Barraki, Mahri-Nui - ART ART ART! [Worldbuilding] [Pitch] [Art] [Character]

Imagine if one of Pridak’s siblings ended up helping the revolution and was declared the new ruler.

Or even more close to home, Pridak’s son. :open_mouth:

Yes, that would be very interesting.

But, I do not think it should be Pridak’s son, as I can’t see Pridak having a son. The idea is that he is so proud he thinks no woman is worthy of his body or to carry his children.

That is how proud he is.

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Yeah, he’d probably have his children executed out of insecurity.

Sibling might work. They’d be old enough to be aware of Pridak’s madness and get out of dodge as soon as possible.

Well, the idea isn’t that he would have his children executed of insecurity. No, that’s not Pridak. He is just too proud to have children with anybody, like I said, he thinks that nobody is worthy of his body.

Pride and paranoia are two very different things.

That gave me a thought: what if Kualus is a distant relative of Pridak? If this proposal is true, then there would have been people who believed that the old family should’ve held the throne, despite Pridak’s crimes. Except when you just had a revolution and everybody hated the old king, nobody is going to listen to that idea. So whatever distant relative was ‘snubbed’ would bide their time, eventually unconsciously accepting their fate. Except said relative would have raised their children with the thought that they weren’t just nobles, they were snubbed royalty. The children grow up thinking this, and it gets passed down through the generations. When it gets to Kualus, he decides to do something stupid about it, and becomes an enemy. (In my head I’m thinking of @DarkMaestro’s story Eidolon, and how Kualus tries to kill Izotor, though that’s not completely necessary.)

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Prideful people can be insecure. If they see someone who is remotely a challenge to them, they’d probably be insecure about it and try to crush them before they can amount to anything. Not necessarily paranoia.

Also, I’m not saying Pridak would have children. I’m saying that if he did, he’d probably have them executed so that no one could challenge him.

@JediTimeLord824 wrote out an origin for the first Toa, but then it was decided that it fit better with this time period. These Toa are Lhikan, Tuyet, Lesovikk, Zaria, Jovan, and Krakua. In my megatopic, under the Toa section, I’ve given both the original Kopaka and Krakua the ancestral sword of Ihu.

What if Krakua is one of Pridak’s relatives (maybe a sibling) and is chosen by Melum to become a Toa to end Pridak’s reign and become the new ruler. He defeats Pridak and banishes his supporters (including close family members, one of them being Kualus’ ancestors).

Due to circumstances, Krakua is unable to assume the mantle of king, and it is passed down to his eldest son.

Before anyone says that Izotor’s relation to Kopaka and Krakua is too coincidental, I’d argue that Melum has a preference when choosing the next Kopaka. Melum is most inclined to choose someone related to (or directly descending from) the original Kopaka. His next choice would be a noble.

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I added much more detailed description of the city, aswell as one paragraph into the Barraki’s history. You can check the edits to see what changed.

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I really like the description and the pictures for the city :smiley:.

One criticism I have is the time period which you have now placed the Barraki. I think it would be much better if they were placed somewhere between 300-700 years before the events of Year 1. Having them all the way back to thousands of years seems a bit too close to the original Toa team, who were summoned specifically to end the War of Three Brothers.

Aside from that, I’m liking how this is going!

Well, it came from your pitch. I do not know the exact date of the Toa Kanohi being sent to Arthaka, but there was some missconception about the timeline and the Toa in those pitches.

From what I remember from what the TTV Cast were saying, the Toa before the Y1 Toa were a few hundred years back, and were responsible for the disappearance of the Kanohi Masks.

Sorry for the confusion.

Nice additions. While the main city seems mostly the same as G1 Mahri Nui, the surrounding area is really what does it for me. I like the idea of the Whispering Caves, and your point on the plethora of new and beautiful scenery due to being underwater is very true. I like where this is going!

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Well, this is quite the conversation you guys have got going on. And, great pitch, @AntrozT6.

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TTV has to write some kind of timeline so confusions such as these don’t happen.

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The first instance of the Toa being created was by the Elemental Gods to overthrow Ekimu and Makuta. As such, neither of them would be involved in such a decision regarding later Toa, as they are both currently “dead”.

Karzahni’s location is unknown to the Matoran, as he was defeated by both his brothers and imprisoned long before the Matoran came to be. They would not have left him somewhere in one of the villages, as they would have taken care to imprision him secretly and quietly, and also because none of the villages existed at that time.

I liked some of the detail you put into your pitch when it comes to the personalities of the Barraki, but your situational pitch does rely on many things happening in canon that do not currently mesh with what we have planned.

Considering how many of the tribes would probably start out as monarchies with tribal leaders before evolving into the governments we have now, it is not completely foreign that the Barraki could have been warlords in the past, nor is it completely foreign that Toa would have been summoned by the Gods to combat them. But including them with Karzahni and trying to put them into the modern day are the parts I see the most problems with.

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@Jon: What do you think about the concept for Mahri Nui? Do you think it would be considered for G3?

First of all, I thank you very much for your answer and for reading this long and exhausting pitch!

I do understand your points about many things not adding up in the timeline, because, when I was pitching it for the first time, I knew not much about the history you have planned for the story. (Makuta and Ekimu being dead at that time, for example.)

Because there is lack of any form of official timeline with events to go off of, I had to pitch it without it.

But that is what pitches are for, sketch the rough idea, develop it further along the way. I am sure we, as a community, could come up with many sensible solutions to the problems you pointed out, if you gave us a chance. :slight_smile:

As to your compliment about the personality of the Warlords: You pointed out in one of the top 10s that Skakdi were more memorable than the Barraki, since the warlords were mostly “one villian spread across multiple characters”. As such, I wanted to develop their characters further, give them more individuality and let people pick their favourite not only by looks, but by the intelligence, charisma and personality.

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Hmm, maybe a Colossi known as Hydraxon could be the warden of the prison and be summoned by the Toa to imprison the Barraki.
Hydraxon is inspired by @Bokarda’s Topic

But his location would probably be known to the elemental gods (Nuva) and through them possibly the Toa.
The Matoran may have also accidentally stumbled across the island, where the prison is located, while exploring the world. They wouldn’t know the prison was there because it would be hidden from them by some means.

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We’re working on an official timeline for our story bible, but the main thing to keep in mind is that the Toa are only brought into being to deal with the Great Beings, therefore there is no friendly interaction between the Toa and either Makuta or Ekimu.

I think that’s a great way to do it. Personally, I feel like the Barraki fit the best as their older warlord selves, and it can lend itself to better flesh out the Bionicle G3 backstory, as well as paint a backdrop for web serials or the like to expound on.

Full disclosure: I feel like Bionicle G1’s main downfall was not so much that it was very complicated, but that the main story was not conveyed properly to enough people. The serials told side stories, but they ended up becoming a decent part of the main plot. For me, the web original series were best when they told a story of the past, such as The Many Deaths of Toa Tuyet and Birth of a Dark Hunter.

So a story focusing on some of the previous Toa and the Barraki would be fun to see, but something that would be given as extraneous information later on into the years.

We toyed around with a concept kind of like Mahri Nui, a village where the Nahoans exclusively used the Mask of Water Breathing until the last Gali took them away. We never settled on that, but it’s not completely outside the purview of the cast.

Not sure where we stand on this “Colossi” concept. Hydraxon and his role might be reserved for something else entirely.

It would not be. The Elemental Gods were brought into the world after the Matoran, not the other way around. Makuta is mad at Ekimu for bringing life into the island, that life is the Matoran, so if he had made the Elemental Gods first, there wouldn’t be any Matoran because that’s where they would have drawn the line at creating sentient life.

Karzahni is sealed away before the Matoran or the Elemental Gods are created, which is why neither Ekimu or Makuta consider him a possibility when the Lightning Tribe appears.

It’s worth noting that Karzahni, while possibly being hinted at, will be an unknown for the entirety of the three year pitch.

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I think retaining the warlords’ original personalities while fleshing each of them out (in the ways suggested) would be pretty interesting to see.

And it would be awesome to see a Toa-led rebellion against the Barraki.

I don’t remember if you ever saw it (or if you’ve heard anything about it), but a brainstorming megatopic I put together features what @RAKRONDEWL is talking about.

The Colossi are basically enforcers on the island, serving various roles under the Three Brothers (I guess two now, according to some clarification in the timeline) to keep the Matoran in check. Also (explained in part in the megatopic), the Colossi possess free will without Makuta’s knowledge, but Ekimu implants a subconscious command to pretend like they have no free will.

Whether or not they play a role in the main story isn’t really too big of a deal. They could just be considered legendary/mythological figures, mentioned in passing or in books.

Alternatively, when the War of Three Brothers (name may not be apt anymore) breaks out, the Colossi (not all, but most) could choose sides and fight against each other, causing much of the destruction. The end result, after the creation of the Toa, is the deaths of some of the Colossi with others going into hiding or surrendering, leaving those who did not participate to their own devices.

If I sound defensive about them, it’s mainly because I thought them up (along with some suggestions); thus, I pretty much have knowledge on all of them (relationships, occupations, homes, powers, etc. which are in the megatopic). Completely up to you how you use them, if you use them.

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@Jon

Well, thank you once again.

Thanks for doing that, I believe we really need a story bible right now, or at least a timeline.
Thank you for clearing the relations between GB and the Toa, however, I believe we are pitching out the second Toa team, described in Bokarda’s megatopic, here. (under the name Toa Kanohi)

The Idea was that the Elemental Gods sent the second Toa team to deal with the Barraki, aswell as few other things from different pitches, and imprison them.

One solution that comes to my mind would be that the Matorans would already find the island with Karzahni’s prison, but be oblivious to it’s existence.
Thus, they would construct another prison on that island, thinking that the dangerous wildlife will do it’s job of preventing them from escaping.

Of course, it would be a great coincidence, but we have to start somewhere, hm?

_

Another idea that I have considered is to NOT have Karzahni at all for the story. At least not in any influential way. Maybe he is on a completely different island than the Barraki are.
It would solve some problems, but, of course, some would arise.

_

Thanks. I already started a project of small short stories, one for each of the warlords, to pitch out their personalities even further and show how they really behave.
Pridak already has a chapter, though, it’s dark… Probably very dark… But hey, that is what the Barraki were even in G1, werent they?
If there ever will be a comic to be written for G3, or a short story about the Barraki, I will gladly write it, if I have the chance. (Right, now I’m just expanding my ego…)

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