Unfortunately, an AT-AT stomped on the cantina they were sitting in
Fortunately, everyone was running from the Empire when it happened.
Unfortunately the Palpatine clones arrived to kill everyone.
Fortunately, the hero never dies.
Unfortunately this takes place alongside the Epic of Gilgamesh where the hero does die.
Fortunately it's hammer time
Unfortunately, it's thor's hammer, so no one can lift it
fortunately Captain America shifts it and Thor freaks out
Unfortunately @LelouchViBritannia gets sp00ked
fortunately @JMP likes turtles
Unfortunately you have nothing to base that statement on.
Fortunately we can arrest you for fraud on falsified charges.
Unfortunately we don't know who you are talking to.
Fortunately, I have a shovel.
Unfortunately I have a gun.
Fortunately that's true
Unfortunately, the above two statements are now false.
Fortunately you statement is also wine of the above so it is false denying that any are false making yours true in an endless loop of time....timey wimey
Unfortunately the endless loop of time creates a paradox that begins eating away at the very fabric of space/time.
Fortunately, space is infinite.