Ok, first the MOC:
Definitely better. Has something very unique to it, too. That... wheel arm in particular I think looks kinda interesting - but also kinda unfinished, you know, like he is some robot still in construction - all of him kinda gives that vibe, actually. Just not sure if a Makuta should look like that...
The main problems I currently see are:
- knees and hips are super skinny compared to the otherwise rather bulky legs
- same goes for his right upper arm compared to the lower arm
- upper torso is a giant gap and needs covering, use of teh Shadow Trap piece there also doesn't seem ideal
- front of the feet look a little weird
- left shoulder could need some armor
So there is room for improvement before he can get accepted.
As to backstory:
First off some more punctuation marks might help...
He needs to have a mask (backstory wise) - and Shadow is an option here, since there's only one Kraahkan - which is worn by Teridax.
No. He's supposed to be a Makuta. Not anything else.
A little over the top, I'd say. Also arguably not terribly innovative. There already are several Makuta who kinda went into that direction sooner or later.
What I just said.
What is that supposed to mean?
So, yeah... Baykstory could need a complete overhaul.
Ok, I really do not want to hurt your feelings, but I think you should maybe consider dropping out of this project.
It's pretty obvious that you apparently don't know a lot about G1 lore, which I feel like kinda makes this project unsuited for you. While your MOCs definitely have certain intersesting elements to them, I also feel like you're still lacking a bit of experience in that regard. Keep MOCing and your skills will improve over time, but presently, with spots for Makuta in the project being all taken, I'd maybe suggest that you give up your spot so that other people who are also interested get a chance to participate.
Please let me know how you decide.
And always remember: No one started out great
Its continuing on and gaining experience that makes you improve.