My Take On TTV's G3 Pitch [Worldbuilding] [Pitch] [Characters]

The TTV Channel Brickonicle
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So, the current running podcast topic is what would Bionicle G3 look like if it was run by TTV, and they keep saying they want feedback, but so far as I can tell there is no official topic to give that feedback, so I made my own. I also posted this in the Patreon comments on episode 234, but I’m not sure how often that gets checked and therefore I’m copying it over here.

I’ve formulated a whole pitch based on the TTV discussion so far, this being the best marriage I can see of all of their ideas, along with a couple of my own. Enjoy.

First off, in this pitch the years go as follows:
YEAR ONE: Rahi
YEAR TWO: Rahkshi
YEAR THREE: Bohrok

Now into a more in depth look at each year:

YEAR ONE:

STORY:
We begin in the island of Mata Nui with the various villages being attacked by Rahi, driven mad by Makuta. During a Rahi attack the various matoran that become the Toa Mata snap under the stress and undergo the change of becoming a Toa (similar to how one becomes a planeswalker in Magic the Gathering), then proceeding to fend off the current attacks on their villages. After the Rahi incursions the matoran are stunned to see the return of the Toa, spirit warriors that haven’t been seen for centuries, and the Toa must struggle to find their place in their own villages. As the Rahi attacks increase in intensity, the Toa are forced to leave their villages in search of the Great Kanohi Masks and Toa Tools of the previous Toa, lost to time in ancient temples scattered across the island. In their search they run into the other Toa and, after working through some differences (as not all of the tribes are on great terms), they work together to find the Toa Temples and then to cleanse the island of the mad Rahi. Having cleansed the island they discover that the Rahi madness was caused by small creatures (kraata) lurking in the background that had come over from the larger continent of Okoto to the West (I literally just chose a direction), and they set sail to find the source of the evil. End of year one.

SETS:

WAVE ONE:
The first wave consists of attacks on the villages, each including:

  • The Toa
  • A matoran or two
  • A set piece
  • A Rahi
  • And a small kraata in the background

The size of the set would be determined by how big the set piece/Rahi is.

WAVE TWO:
The second wave would consist of the Toa Temples and size would be determined by the size of the temple and how many Toa were included (as they did meet during the search and would this be in smaller groups depending on how many of the had met).

YEAR TWO:

For the second year the story would need to backtrack slightly in order to set the stage for when the Toa arrive, similar to how Bara Magna was set up before Mata Nui got there, so:

SETUP:
The Okotian continent is vastly different from the tribal setting of Mata Nui, here there are sprawling cities as opposed to isolated villages, and matoran of merit are taken into monasteries and trained for years to undergo the Toa Trials. Those that succeed are granted the honor of receiving power from the ancient Toa Stones (for appearances sake they are carved in the shape of the Nuva Symbols) and transformed into Toa. Six of these aspirants failed the trials, and were seduced by Makuta at the promise of an easy path to power, they were each granted a Kraata, a piece of Makuta himself, which fused with them allowing them to take on the power of the Rahi and filling them with sick twisted versions of the elements, and he named them the Rahkshi meaning: sons of shadow. In secret the Rahkshi sought out the fragments of the legendary Mask of Time, and used it to freeze the continent and all of it’s Toa protectors so that their master’s plans could go uninterrupted. Having been used the mask shattered and returned to it’s sanctuaries.

BACK TO THE TOA:
The Toa arrive on Okoto to find everyone frozen and, after searching through the archives, come to the conclusion that only the Mask of Time could have caused this, and thus, only the Mask of Time can fix it. They also find some cryptic riddles referencing the hiding places of the shards of the Mask of Time. Armed with this knowledge they set off in search of the pieces, only to run into the Rahkshi as they search. Finding themselves vastly outmatched, as the Rahkshi were classically trained to become Toa and the Toa themselves have no idea what they are doing, they are forced to try and beat the Rahkshi to the remaining pieces and steal the ones the Rahkshi already have. After much trial and strife, the Toa are eventually able to get all of the pieces of the Mask of Time and unfreeze the island. They then team up with the native Toa to defeat the Rahkshi, and picking up some training along the way. The Toa take on the name the Toa Mata to differentiate themselves as they are from Mata Nui, and it is revealed that in terms of raw power they are far above the Okotian Toa as they were transformed naturally rather than by an ancient Toa Stones. However it turns out that the chaos was able to buy Makuta enough time to activate his endgame, as they year ends with the awakening of the Bohrok.

SETS:

WAVE ONE:
The first wave consists of the Toa’s quest to construct the Mask of Time and would depict the various battles between smaller groups of the Toa and the various Rahkshi of the fragments of the Mask of Time.

WAVE TWO:
The second wave shows the Toa Mata teaming up with the native Toa in order to defeat the Rahkshi.

YEAR THREE:
With the Bohrok unleashed, swarms stream across the continent destroying everything in their path, cleansing the island in preparation for the rise of the Bahrag, the slowly awakening queens destined to devour this world and give birth to the new one (taking a page out of Norse mythology). The Okotian Toa must struggle to hold back the Bohrok swarms as the Toa Mata go to defeat the Bahrag.

SETS:

WAVE ONE:
The first wave would show the struggle of the Okotian Toa against the Bohrok, and would be varied in size based on the number of Bohrok and Toa included as well as the size of the set piece that set the stage of the fight.

WAVE TWO:
The second wave would have to be the battle between the Toa Mata and the Bahrag, and would probably be accomplished through individual Toa sets (larger for the more popular Toa) with small set pieces and maybe a Book or TWO, that could then link together along with a large Bahrag set in order to depict the entire battle.

Now, to address some things I’ve thought about since making the Patreon comments that I copied above:

You may notice the complete lack of any mention of the Great Spirit, asleep or otherwise, this is not because I have scrapped the idea, but instead I feel that it should be left out of the three year plan. It’s easy to give the existence of the Great Spirit with a couple of lines about “the Great Spirit who protects all” and maybe even some totems of the Great Spirit scattered around the villages. It’s even easy to give the impression that something may have happened to the Great Spirit with a matoran screaming “why would the Great Spirit let this happen?” But it still doesn’t tie it into the main story, and this it doesn’t create loose ends of the line only goes for the three years. If the line did get extended, it would be easy to then take those few lines of foreshadowing and explore what happened to the Great Spirit, this opening up for another long story arc.

As far as Makuta’s motivation to want to unleash the Bahrag and destroy the world, I was basing that off of the idea that someone (I can’t remember who) on the podcast threw out that Makuta wants to remake the world in his image. That’s why I included that the Bahrag devour this world and give birth to the new one. Mata is using them as a tool to reset the world so he can remake it in his image.

Moving into farther exploration of the Rahkshi, I think it would be cool to have their personalities and backstories mirror their powers. For example: upon failing the Toa Trials, the matoran Kurahk was filled with rage, so when became a Rahkshi, he is still on an incredibly short fuse, fighting with every ounce of fury he has, while also instilling rage in those around him, destroying their unity and taking strength from the very thing that weakens his opponents. Or Vorahk, whose failure consumed him to the point of being empty, and so when he became a Rahkshi he’s filled with an insatiable hunger for power, so he devours the strength of his enemies in an attempt to fill the void. Perhaps Turahk was so afraid of failing the Trials that he chickened out and didn’t even try, so as a Rahkshi he lies in wait, cowardly ambushing his opponents before dissappearing into the shadows again, gaining confidence as they grovel in the fear that once controlled him. Panrahk could simply be a broken man, one whose spirit was shattered by his failure at the Trails to the point that life had no meaning anymore; and as a Rahkshi he is incredibly apathetic, not really caring what happens and just destroying things because it’s not like it matters anyways. Maybe for Lerahk, his powers are something like pestilence instead of poison. Maybe he was sick on the day of the Trials, and it was because of that he was too weak to finish; and so when he became a Rahkshi, he weakens those around them, as though his very presence is a sickness. And then for Guurahk… actually I can’t think of anything for Guurahk. But I really like the idea that when creating the Rahkshi, Makuta took their greatest weaknesses and made it into their strengths so that they could inflict it upon others. It seems to hold some sort of poetic justice in my opinion.

But anyways, those are just my thoughts. Congrats if you made it all the way through, and thank you for listening to my rambling ideas. As always I’d love to hear what others think of my take on TTV’s take on G3.

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Even without a budget, it’s better than G2.

In all seriousness,I really like this! You incorporated the TTV’s ideas with your own flawlessly, and achieved a better and less confusing story arc than G1 or G2! I like all the ideas and concepts but I think that the rahkshi before,as shunned matoran, but now, as vicious creatures with their past failures now their powers, is definitely the best of them all!

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I like their ideas but I’m not a big fan of how they’re trying to redesign the rahkshi. They feel so different that they come across as something new entirely rather than the lizard like creatures that they’re based off of.

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Yeah, I wasn’t sure about all of the changes to the Rahkshi at first, that’s why I tried to reincorporate the Kraata and the title “Sons of Shadow” (the original defintion of Rahkshi). I was trying to stay true to the concept of the Rahkshi as the so called sons of Makuta, who hold a piece of the Makuta himself.

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The idea of the Rahkshi being cast-out villagers transformed by Makuta could be combined with the slugs-in-armor idea by the villagers first carrying the slugs as communication links to Makuta. Slow, mutative effects could over time meld and mold them into the monsters the Toa later encounter. I’d imagine them carrying the slugs in cases on their back and headgear, which would fuse with the body in the transformation. The resultant being would mix the vile, aggressive nature of the slugs with individual character traits of the villagers and resemble the Rahkshi as we know them from G1.

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A very cool plan overall. I especially like the concept of the Rahkshi- outcasted Matoran whose weaknesses were made into strengths. It’s a neat backstory.

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Going more into the differences between Mata Nui and Okoto:

First of all, Mata Nui is very reminiscent of the original 2001 island. It’s very much the tribal feel, and as such, Toa are revealed as these spirit warriors that are incredibly rare. In fact I personally think that the Kanohi and Toa Tools that the Toa must find are the only ones on the entire island. They are ancient artifacts that were kept in temples awaiting the coming of the next Toa, lost to time as the matoran were forced to abandon the temple, be it due to natural disasters, Rahi incursions, or simply giving up hope that the Toa would come.

Okoto on the other hand is completely different. First of all, they have a higher level of technology than Mata Nui, not like Metru Nui mind you (nowhere near that advanced), more like if Mata Nui is in the Stone Age, Okoto is in the Bronze Age. I imagine it as a cross between Metru Nui and the Ancient City in G2, with the culture leaning toward Metru Nui but the appearance and actual architecture closer to the Ancient City. That being said, in Okoto Toa are common. And thus Toa Tools are also common. As matoran are trained in these monasteries they are instructed in all manors of combat, across many disciplines from swordplay, to archery, and even hand to hand. Their choice of weapon is ultimately their own, in what they choose to specialize and eventually master. Kanohi on the other hand are still held with reverence, but in a much different way. Where on Mata Nui masks were relics of power that were prized possessions of the tribe as a whole, on Okoto they are far more personal. You see: Okoto has mask forges. Masks are made everyday, and are seen less as relics or artifacts and more like masterpieces. While many masks may have the same power, and many may look similar, they are in no way mass produced, each one is carefully crafted by a mask maker, and is in some way unique, even from those of the same power and design. But more important than this is the process by which a Toa receives their mask because the way I see it, Kanohi are very much like wands in Harry Potter, and while a Toa may choose his tools, the mask chooses the Toa.

On some other topics as far as references to previous generations, the general structure of the world, of course everyone’s favorite thing: Jargon:

First, some throwbacks:

I think that Kohlii should totally be a sport on Mata Nui, it’s a great throwback and adds to the general feel of the world. So I thing that there should be a whole story arc about it? Heck no! But it is a nice little detail that takes practically no effort to include and makes the world feel alive.

Similarly I think that Kanoka should exist in Okoto. I love Kanoka. They were incredibly unique and had so much importance in world building as they were used for making masks, as well as being weapons, and being used in the sport Akilini, which I think should also be included for similar reasons as Kohlii.

Now for world structure:

I think that the original island of Mata Nui was absolutely perfect and that nothing about it needs to change. That being said, Okoto should not be a diamond shaped island decided into sixths by mountain ranges. Islands come in different shaped, and Okoto shouldn’t be shaped anything like Mata Nui. I also feel that the cities on Okoto shouldn’t be placed so they all share boarders. Perhaps the center of the island is a vast desert housing the Elemental city of Stone, and the other elements are planes around that. Maybe the Jungle for the Element city of Air (Oh yeah, I think we should bring back air as the main element and put jungle/plantlife back as a secondary) is placed between Stone and Water. Instead of the Elemental city of Earth being just a village built in caves, it should be a vast city carved into the mountains like the dwarves cities in the Lord of the rings. (By the way, I’m not suggesting we call them elemental cities, I’m just refraining from using jargon because I havent talked about it yet).

Also, speaking of the secondary elements, I think they should be present on Okoto. However, they are very rare, and their small villages exist in the suburbs of the elemental cities. Since on Okoto Toa are created by way of the Toa Stones, and there are only Toa Stones for the main six elements, Matoran of the secondary elements that become Toa are trained in the monasteries of their companion elements (each secondary element would be paired with a main element that they are “compatible” with such as air with jungle) and when they become Toa their powers are of the main element, but they still maintain partial powers of their original element. Mind you this doesn’t always work, sometimes even those that succeed the trials do not become Toa, just because they are incompatible with the Toa Stones.

Finally, jargon:

First of all I think we need to bring back all of the elemental prefixes. They were great and they make life so much easier. Next, the return of the word koro, meaning village, this all of the villages on Mata Nui would once again be the koros, but also the smaller villages of the secondary elements on Okoto. In the same vain I think we need the word Metru, meaning city, to describe all of the elemental cities on Okoto. Finally, I think that Turaga should be redefined as simply “elder” instead of it being reserved for the end cycle of a Toa’s life. The way I figure is that eventually a Toa’s power begins to wait and they turn back into a matoran, but usually they are very old by this point and have this already crossed over into being a Turaga.

Anyways, that was a lot. It didn’t seem like that much in my head, but now that I’ve typed it out I’m starting to realize just how much world building I’ve gotten in to… As always I look forward to your thoughts on what I’ve said, be it positive or negative.

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Based on the TTV’s G3 story and the new “creation myth” which put Ekimu/Mata Nui as creator of the Matoran while Makuta created all Rahi, I think I found a way to make “frozen-in-time” island scenario more challenging for the Toa. This might be a bit long, so please bear with me here.

As their creator, Makuta would by default have dominion over Rahi whether it be direct mental control or indirect corruption by Kraata as @Matanui606 suggested . This connection would allow Makuta to make the Rahi hostile toward anyone who opposes his plan (e.g. Toa).

While TTV created a circumstance which all things on the island were frozen with Mask of Time, I proposed that we make Ekimu, the mask maker, gifted all of his creation with his masks and ability to connect to and utilize the mask, a path Makuta didn’t choose. This would confined the masks to only be worn by Matoran, but not Rahi.

Makuta, being a excellent schemer, exploited this difference by using the Mask of Time to freeze only those who has connection to the Ekimu’s masks at the time thus froze only the mask-wearing Matoran, not the Rahi of the Rahkshi (which I guess Makuta might “converted” those former Matoran into using sources of power other than the masks, Kraata for example).

As how the Toa-destined Matoran managed to evade the time freeze, I’m thinking along the line of having them being unmasked when the “great cataclysm” happened. This could be achieved by random chances, Ekimu’s divine intervention, or a “festival of masks” ceremony which six villager, one from each tribes, would be given a new mask as a sign of maturity, or something like that.

This scenario would still present Toa with task of fighting against the Rahkshi to unfreeze the island while adding menace of various infected wild Rahi into the mix.

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That’s an interesting idea, which episode did they talk about the creation mythos in? I don’t really remember that part. However, one of the reasons why I moved the time freeze and the Rahkshi to the second year in another island is that the reasons they’d come up with for the toa dodging the freeze seemed didn’t seem very plausible and were, at least to me, riddled with possible plot holes. That’s why I felt it would be easier to put it on another island and make it a localized time freeze, and the Toa simply weren’t within the area when it was frozen. As far as the Rahkshi having Rahi helping them, I didn’t really go into it but I do remember the idea being thrown out that the Rahkshi could control the Rahi, and I think that that could work rather well, although, I feel it would probably work better with just a few Rahi that the Rahkshi kept as thrulls, rather than all of the Rahi being completely unaffected.

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I believe it is in episode #234, but it wasn’t dicussed in detail. Just one of the cast threw his idea out there, followed by small discussion about having seperate names for the Great Spirit (Ekimu) and the island (Mata Nui) I think.

I also have some idea about source of Guurahk’s power. His pride was destroyed when he was rejected from the Toa stone ceremony, so he use his power to reduce everyone else’s hopes and dreams to dust (Disintegration).

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I remember that part, I guess I just didn’t catch the part about who created what. Speaking of that separation though: I disagree with TTV on this point. I think that Mata Nui should remain the name of the Great Spirit for a couple of reasons: first, I’m G1 the literal translation of “Mata Nui” was “Great Spirit” coming from “Mata” meaning “Spirit” and “Nui” meaning “Great.” This is why in The Mask of Light the Toa Mata are introduced as the “Spirit of [element]” because they are the “Toa Spirit” or, knowing that “Toa” roughly translates to “Warrior,” they are “Spirit Warriors.” I think that these sort of easter eggs in the naming conventions were really cool and help to make the world seem more cohesive. Secondly, it makes perfect sense that they would name their island after their deity and this it makes sense that the names would be the same.

That is not to say that I think that Ekimu should not be in G3, personally I think he should be combined with Artakah (a character he has far more in common with than Mata Nui) and placed on the Okotian Continent as a master craftsman and (of course) mask maker.

I LIKE IT!

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[quote=“Matanui606, post:1, topic:33672”]
Moving into farther exploration of the Rahkshi, I think it would be cool to have their personalities and backstories mirror their powers. [/quote]
I really like that idea. I have kind of taken a great liking to the G3 Rahkshi, and that fits my ideas of the characters.

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Ok, now that we’ve got some new information about the elements, I think it’s time for me to revisit this topic and figure out how this affects my pitch.

First of all, I haven’t said anything about the environment of Mata Nui, and I don’t plan on saying much now either. I love @Oomatu’s designs for Ga-Wahi and Le-Wahi, and I feel like I’ll probably like his other designs as well. The only region I feel I need to touch on is the region of earth because I really want it to remain underground as in previous gens. This of course poses a problem as earth now includes plantlife and plants don’t generally grow underground due to needing light. A couple of solutions for this were brainstormed over in the elemental poll topic, including either having skylights built into the tunnels to allow plants to grow, or, my favorite, have the underground village built amongst the root system of a forest. I feel that the later option in particular solidifies the connection between the plants and the earth, living at that point of connection, where the plants themselves draw their strength from the earth.

Moving over to the larger Okotian continent, the changes to earth kinda throw a monkey wrench into my idea of a sort of dwarven style city built inside of a mountain range. With the elements being based on environments, a setting like that would almost surely yield matoran of stone rather than earth. I don’t really have a solution or a replacement idea for this yet, but I would like to see the Okotion earth tribe differ greatly from the earth tribe on Mata Nui. I like the idea that because Okoto is less tribal, that the earth tribe has sort of lost touch with nature. That the plants they summon would be like dry creaking branches, where Onua has living plants growing off of his armor, they have wooden accents that would be carved but, ultimately, dead. I feel like the Okotian Toa of Earth would have less respect for nature as they have gone over more to the sort of civilization based ideals, where nature only exists to serve them and their needs. I think that this contrast would pose some interesting interactions when Onua met them, and that it could add an interesting situation where the generally laid back Onua sees something that is completely against all of his beliefs and seeing how he reacts to that would be interesting.

I also earlier posed the idea of secondary elements being sort of sub elements within the different villages. Based on @Scorpion_Strike’s ramblings I would say that matoran of lightning would exist in the air region as matoran who were struck by lightning, however, I don’t agree with his idea of them becoming a storm chaser tribe. I would more of think of them as a sort of subcomunity of the air region who aren’t necessarily separate at all. Le-Matoran are famously jovial, and I feel like lightning matoran who would have still been raised there would share this quality. As far as other secondary elements, I haven’t really figured much out. Having to justify how they are exposed to the element in a particular region makes things more difficult and I just haven’t had time to think too much thought into it.

The only other thing I’d like to touch on is the Cult of Makuta, or in other words: the Brotherhood. I’d like the Brotherhood to be an ever present problem on Okoto, the idea being that the Brotherhood are what all of the Toa on Okoto are fighting. As far as design of the Brotherhood, I see them as a shadowy organization that exists across all of the various cities. A matoran here, a Turaga there, sort of like a mafia that has infiltrated the government, some of them working to accomplish the will of Makuta in broad daylight, while others work in the shadows. The common denominator of members of the Brotherhood would be a special mask, gifted from Makuta himself. It wouldn’t something that they would wear normally, but when they go out to do the will of Makuta, they would don these masks and would be cloaked in shadows concealing their identity, and any elemental powers used by them would be stained by the shadow, such that fire would burn with black flame, etcetera. It would have probably been members of the Brotherhood who recruited the matoran that would become the Rahkshi and sent them to Makuta. The only issue is that I don’t really see how they could factor into the main story for the first three years. The way I’ve set it up, Okoto is already frozen when the Toa get there, and then almost immediately after the defeat of the Rahkshi begins the rise of the Bohrok, there’s no real opportunity to show the Brotherhood’s hand in all of it. Now if the line caught on then it would a great way to extend the story, as Makuta is gone but his followers are still out there, working towards the return of their master. But that’s pretty much all I’ve got.

Thanks if you managed to get through all of this, as always feedback is greatly appreciated.

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So, in your perspective, in G3 will exist only three years?

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No, but lego lines are innitially plans for three years, so I planned for three years. There are of course ways to extend the story, for example, farther exploration into the Brotherhood would be a great way to extend it after Makuta is defeated, as they work to bring about his return.

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This is incredible but I just had an idea that I thought was sorta interesting is that in the bioncle G2 concept art book there was a drawing of a dark Kopaka and that reminded me of when Lewa fought Onua in MNOG because of the corrupted mask. So I’m pretty much trying to say is make a fight like Lewa V Onua in MNOG but swap Lewa out for Kopaka and Onua for anyone else or keep it the same, idk I just thought it was interesting

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Kopaka Vs Pohatu. Done.

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So, now that the podcast is officially out, I can talk about things. First of all: the genders. Anyone who has been following the poll topics knows that I have very strongly opposed the idea of genderbending any of the Toa, however, after the most recent podcast, and conversation with Eljay over on discord, I have changed that stance. Why you ask? Well that would be because of the main topic of this update: Toa Spirits. The idea that the name of a Toa is more of a title tied to a Toa Spirit is great, and it alleviates nearly all of my concerns with the proposed gender changes. That being said, in the current configuration of this pitch, some of the ideas are somewhat contradictory, mainly the idea that there are more than six Toa. So, it’s one time for me to make the idea’s merge into one:

So, the basis of me merging my idea’s with TTV G3 Canon is the sort of Native American/Oriental idea of local spirits. The theology that with the exception of the Great Spirit you don’t really have all powerful, omnipotent, omnipresent gods, instead you have the local spirits that live in the area that you need to appease for the world to remain in harmony. Among these spirits I would of course include the elemental spirits of the island, which I would model after the G2 elemental creatures. So how do Toa Spirits fit in? Well, Toa Spirits are different, I’d model them more off of Oriental Ancestral Spirits, so instead of being embodiments of elements, these Toa Spirits are, as they said on the podcast, more like Avatar were they are the conglomeration of the spirits of the past Toa and exist as the embodiment of that Toa. So, a Toa Spirit is less of one individual spirit and more a group of spirits that will most times speak with one general voice, however this also opens up the possibility of situations where the Toa through meditation receive counsel from a specific previous Toa. Now, returning to the issue of Toa transformation, I previously described it as something inside them snapping and their spark igniting, I am now going to amend that slightly. I will now say that it is the Great Spirit himself that ignites that spark, choosing who will be the Toa, and then it is up to the Toa to connect with their Toa Spirits. This opens up I subplot option that I’m a really big fan of where one of the Toa has difficulties connecting to their Toa Spirit and refuses to be called by their Toa name until they do because they feel that they are unworthy. I’m not sure which Toa would be suited for this arc except that I know it shouldn’t be Lewa. Lewa’s all about freedom and going with the flow and as such I believe would have a very easy time forming a connection with their spirit. This idea also reinforces the first story arc of my proposal where the Toa need to seek out the Toa Temples and retrieve their masks/armor/tools. The idea is farther supported by the tools themselves, these tools being passed down from Toa to Toa and each Toa leaving their own sort of mark on them, the tools being sort of a physical representation of the mantle of the Toa Spirits.

Now, you might be thinking: “How does this solve anything? There are still only the six Toa and your pitch calls for more.” The answer is simple: all of what I have stated above only applies to Mata Nui, Okoto is completely different. On Okoto Toa are not chosen by the Great Spirit, they are trained as I have gone into a fair amount of detail previously, and as such they do not have ancestral Toa Spirits. This kinda goes into how I want Mata Nui and Okoto to be very culturally distinct from each other. While Mata Nui is very Duty and Destiny based, having the Great Spirit choose those that are destined to be heros, Okoto is much more Unity and Duty Based, training their Toa and working together to accomplish great things. This ties into the story as the Toa Mata must learn unity in year one to work together to save the island, while the Okotian Toa must learn to embrace Destiny in year three as the Toa Mata go forth to save the world. Duty is a shared virtue as it is the basis of what it means to be a Toa, year two would spotlight on this as the Toa from different islands try to reconcile their dierent view views on Duty. Now coming back from that tangent, the idea of Okoto not having Toa Spirits farther supports the idea of Okotian This being fundamentally weaker than the Toa Mata as they lack that extra support.

“So, if Okoto doesn’t have Toa Spirits, what does it have?” I hear you asking. Well, they have the Kaita. Now hold up, calm down, and stop sharpening the pitchforks, I know this has eeen a controversial issue lately, and honestly I’ve been on the anti-Kaita side of things. But I’ve had this idea raddling around in my head for about a week, and I think it could work. I will preface this with the disclaimer that this is not part of my three year pitch, this is something that could be expanded into and looked at if the line for extended, at most it would be only hinted at in the first three years. No that that’s out of the way, time to dive in: the way I see the Kaita in G3 is as sort of angelic beings that serve the Great Spirit, branching off of the suggestions of @ReeseEH and @StudentScissors in the Kaita polls, there would be Kaita representing different combinations of various numbers of elements. Now, as far as how the Kaita would factor into the story, should it ever come to that, I want to be very clear that the Toa in no way combine. Kaita ate otherworldly beings that can be summoned through use of a Kaita Talisman and a ritual performed by the Toa, each talisman is specific to one Kaita and the ritual must be performed by Toa of the elements that Kaita represents. Summoning a Kaita takes energy, specifically elemental energy, and a Toa can only maintain the Kaita as long as they can maintain constant use of their elemental powers, each group is only as strong as their weakest link. The group of Toa can of course choose to end the ritual at any time, and doing so sends the Kaita back to where it came from. I should also mention that the Toa cannot control the Kaita, they can of course influence It, but each Kaita has it’s own personality and cannot be forced to go against it’s nature. And while all of the Kits are generally good, some are more chaotic in nature and could be influenced to do some less than good things. But as I said, this doesn’t really affect the three year pitch, it’s just another bit of worldbuilding that could be expanded upon if the line was extended.

Not really connected to anything I’ve said above, i would like to talk about the question of Toa killing and the Toa Code in general. I have a sort of split view on this as I feel that these don’t really apply to the island of Mata Nui, given that is a rural society that most likely follows the law of the jungle. Also with the Toa being chosen by Mata Nui it is easy to see how the Toa could be considered his judges and thus have the freedom to judge those who they fight, and determine their punishment. Okoto on the other hand is much different, it’s Toa are organized into a sort of police force, someone (I can’t remember if it was in this topic or on discord) compared them to the Jedi, and that is very accurate. As such I believe that they would have a very strict non- killing policy and would have to adhere to a Toa Code, following the idea that their opponents must stand trial for their crimes. A while back I wrote what I believed the Oath of a Toa might be, and I would like to repurpose it here as the Oath of an Okotian Toa. It can be found here:

Now to reply to the comments that were made while I typed all this!

I like this idea. I’ve been very much painting with broad strokes for the story, And I’m not sure exactly which year this would fit into, probably not three, but I’m definitely open to it.

Works for me.

Anyways, congratulations once again if you made it through my monolithic walls of text, as always comments and criticism are always appreciated.

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This pitch has been itching at me over the last week, so I’d like to go through this bit by bit.

This is hands down the most boring aspect of this pitch. It is essentially 2001 being retold with some very slight changes.

This is an incredibly contrived way to have them become Toa. Has a Matoran never become stressed before simply by working? Is it a certain kind of stress? “Stress” being a factor is a rather poor reason for a transformation.

So before this, the Toa fend off the Rahi attacks that had caused so much stress to them which caused them to become Toa. And after the attacks increase in intensity, they… leave? Who are defending the villages now? Will more Toa appear because Matoran are stressed?

Everything else about this is generally straight from 2001, aside from the Kraata, but that’s minor. The major issue I have with all of this comes in Year Two.

So, you spend one year (less than, given a usual story year) setting up your island and your world, and establishing the world which your characters inhabit… And then at the end of the year, you then move everyone to a new location with new rules? And to top that all off, you move everyone from an island to a continent. Do you realize how big a continent is? That is a massive amount of land which you now need to set up. In addition, the feel is completely different. You’ve gone from a rural, tribal setting to a sprawling city on a continent. That is an incredibly large tonal and environmental ■■■■■ in a small amount of time, and it discards all world-building that was done the year prior.

In addition, Toa are now made by Toa Stones. Where do they come from? How? Why is it different from Mata Nui? Why does hard work and a Toa Stone make Toa on Okoto, but stress makes them on Mata Nui?

So six of these Matoran fail their trials, so they can’t be Toa. They are then able to become Rahkshi which proceed to steal some of the fragments, and manage to beat all of the Okoto Toa and freeze all the cities on the continent.

If these six Matoran failed becoming Toa, then how are they beating all these Toa? And why do only small portions freeze large areas of this massive landmass? Why wouldn’t they just use all of them?

You informed me that you’d introduce roughly 20 Toa in this place. Last I checked, 20 was way more than 6. No matter what the strength, six Toa wannabe failures will not beat roughly 20 Toa. And on that subject, 20 Toa?! You NEED to focus on your six protagonists. You can give some spotlight to those that will help them, but otherwise they must be the focus of the story. They are the themes protagonists. And if you introduce six Toa (not counting any Matoran or Turaga you may have) then you will take focus away from them. And because you have so many Toa, you will then have to spread the focus between roughly 4 Toa Teams worth of characters which no one will care about by the end of it because they won’t get enough focus/character development within the year.

Also,

What is the twisted version of Ice? Or Stone?

This is mostly uninteresting, as it’s a slight modification to 2002 but without any of the mystery and intrigue.

All in all, a lot of this pitch is rather illogical. I’m not sure that you know how to create a story that will resonate with anyone that isn’t a BIONICLE fan looking to see the golden years rehashed for the most part… This falls into many of G1’s traps (large numbers and areas, skipping to new locations almost every year, introducing too many characters) in a short time span. G1 took 10 years to build and develop all of it’s world. You are suggesting doing all this in three years. You aren’t giving anyone time to invest in any characters, or location, or mythos before you change it drastically. You’re writing things down that sound cool on paper to a BIONICLE fan but will not and can not work in practice.

This hasn’t been properly thought out because you’re not giving any consideration to how someone would consume it’s media. A BIONICLE fan might be interested, but a theme will not survive on BIONICLE fans. You need to appeal to those outside it, and with the way this is set up now you will attract nothing but criticism for G1’s failings.

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Which is exactly what G2 was, sure it traded Rahi for hordes of skull spiders, but it was still a general retelling, and from what little plot had been presented on the podcast a month ago when I wrote this, that seemed the direction your guy’s pitch was going as well.

Yeah, this was mostly based off of how planeswalkers ignore their spark in magic the gathering, in my most recent post I changed how it works entirely.

I see your point, but given the changes mentioned above, I think this is no longer a problem. Having the Toa chosen by the Great Spirit means that they can appear as the attacks begin and then be sent to claim their mantle as Toa.

There are actually several things that aren’t out of 2001, for example having them transform from matoran and retain their memories poses an interesting conundrum as they try to understand their new place in the village. The existence of the Toa Temples explains why they have to go search out these things rather than just having masks spread across the island with no explanation of how they got there. There’s also the TTV Canon changes to earth that shake things up as well as Lewa being female. Yes it’s a lot like 2001, but that’s what makes it feel like Bionicle, completely changing the storyline would make the line incredibly removed from its roots.

I remind you that this was written a month ago while the G3 discussion was in it’s infancy. At the time you were toying with the idea of island hopping and it was also preposed that there would be weekly worldbuilding columns on the website. An article every week for a year is more than enough to establish an entire island, and honestly, by the end of the year, you’d be scraping the bottom of the barrel for content. A ■■■■■ to a new island allows for new worldbuilding as you explore the entirely new culture of the area.

From a worldbuilding standpoint, a continent is no harder to set up than an island, in some ways it’s easier. On a continent there’s no way you could possibly see everything, as such, large areas can be painted abstractly, as opposed to an island where you need to make sure you design every part of it. On a continent, you only really have to design the major cities, the area around them, and the roads between them.

The large tonal ■■■■■ is intentional, when you move to a new location, you need to show that it’s new, it needs to feel distinct. Also, culture varies wildly from one island to the next, it’s preposterous to think that they would be exactly the same.

Once again, I wanted to show that there is a very distinct cultural decide between Okoto and Mata Nui, the Toa Stones are something that exists on Okoto but not Mata Nui, this their culture evolved around them. In my most recent post, I go in to how this difference shows the value that the inhabitants of Mata Nui put on Destiny, having their hero’s chosen by the Great Spirit, where the inhabitants of Okoto put more emphasis on Unity, working together in large groups of Toa.

No, they get all of the fragments of the Mask of Time in secret, given that the Okotian Toa don’t even know that they exist, then they freeze the continent.

Ninjago’s tournament of elements introduced loads of new elemental masters, but still managed to keep the spotlight on the protagonists. You can have a large number of supporting characters and still focus on the main team.

That line was more metaphorical, talking about the Rahkshi elements.

If course it’s uninteresting, it’s two sentences to sum up an entire year of story, you take any year of G1 and boil it down to two sentences and it will be boring. This is a framework. A skeleton. It still needs to be fleshed out.

You, being someone who has knowledge of G1’s golden years can’t accurately make this statement.

Once again, this pitch was made under the assumption of both a TV show, and weekly worldbuilding columns, that’s a lot of space to fill with content.

Actually I did, see above.

Saying that I need to appeal to those outside of the preexisting fan base isn’t a real criticism. All one needs to do is not tell a crappy story like G2 and it can appeal to new audiences. Bionicle is a story driven theme, thus, you simply need to tell a good story.

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