I was having the best sleep in my life. Then I dreamed about falling in a blender.
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I stayed up all night playing video games. I need to leave for work in a few hours
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in the car for mcdonala mom asks me if nuggets or burger
Then I get text message from mom she say I’m allergic to burger and nuggrt
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I sneezed and heard someone say “bless you”. Then I remembered I’m at home alone.
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I heard someone sneeze and I said “bless you.”
Then to my utmost horror, I realized I was inside the film Home Alone starring Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, and Daniel Stern.
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I heard someone sneeze, and another say “Bless you!”. Neither realized I was in the house …
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I give someone a tissue to blow their nose. Somehow three guys think that their alone, better played the Tiffany song “I think we are alone now.”
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“Eggs don’t have ice,” I tell myself.
The egg dripped out with the diamond rolex escaped my attention.
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What’s this? Only the existential question that we’ve all asked.
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Erm this is only one sentence 
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I had a funny idea for a post!
(post deleted by author)
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This right here is scary enough on its own
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Guys, you’re all letting me down in so many ways.
i can’t believe you people right now.
None of these posts have been two sentences and it makes me very mad.
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“Wow, this book is really good,” I said.
Then John Hollywood, watching from a nearby bush, started writing something down.
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You are what you eat.
I’m a human.
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“This business is not liable for damage to packages…”
I immediately signed the waiver.
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“Oh boy, I can’t wait to serve Pizza Hut’s new hot honey pizza” I said at my job as an employee of Pizza Hut.
“One honey pizza,” said six million bees in a trenchcoat
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Oh boy, I can’t wait to serve Pizza Hut’s new hot honey pizza” I said at my job as an employee of Pizza Hut.
“One class-action lawsuit,” said a bee in a suit and tie
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Got a text from my uncle today saying “see you soon”.
He died two years ago…
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I was delighted to have Racie’s uncle over for dinner two years ago.
I’m curious if others in the enunder bloodline also taste like chicken.
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