MT's Guide To Playing ZSS Professionally

So lots of people (and by lots I mean a grand total of one) have been asking me how I’m so freaking good at Super Smash Bros. What they don’t realize is that I’m actually a scrub who just uses this one easy trick to win. After being paid a ridiculous sum of money (10 cents and a Chick Fil A sandwich), I’ve decided to release my secrets to the public.

HOW TO BE A PROFESSIONAL ZSS PLAYER

Step #1: Select default color ZSS from the character select screen (all the other colors suck and if you pick them you will assuredly lose)
Step #2: When the game starts, grab your opponent and down throw them
Step #3: Follow them into the sky and uair them repeatedly

Now from here, the game can proceed in two different ways.

Either A, your opponent will realize you’re simply trying to grab them every time and avoid your attack, at which point you should scream and call them a cheater and then stop playing (minimize your losses)

Or B (most likely), your opponent will never figure it out and you can rack up infinite damage on them to win the game. Continue doing this to get tons of wins and achieve a 70%+ win rate on For Glory

And that’s all there is to playing ZSS. Congratulations, you learned absolutely nothing!

…so just go main Diddy Kong or something I guess

-MT

6 Likes

Maybe this will convince me to main ZSS again

Or maybe I’ll continue to pride myself on playing a fair game… (even though I lose most of the time)

clap clap clap

Huh, we should play smash bros sometime. Could be fun :laughing:

Falco FTW

Fite me u scrub

-MT

4 Likes

ZSS.

git gud skrub.

do you even pac man?

1 Like

Do you even Game and Watch?
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

srsly m8

pac man & g/w

get ur characters out of the 80s and pleh a r34l fiter

-MT

1 Like

1v1 meh
ill rek u so hrd ull be in de ston age

1 Like

I’ll stone you so hard you’ll be in the wreckage

Yep

-MT

3 Likes

I’ve mained Samus for my entire SSB carrier, aka SSB Brawl. That’s it. I’ve tried Link, Yoshi, Meta Knight, Pokemon Trainer, and R.O.B., but I always go back to Samus.

You’re a better man than I. Brawl Samus was so bad I just stopped playing her and switched to ZSS because I wanted to main someone from Metroid.

-MT

I think it is because she was the first character I ever played as, and I did so for, geez, 6-7? hours straight. It kinda set the pace for the rest of my SSBB relationship. :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:

good tactics

maybe i should get a wii u

a haw haw haw

-Mesonak

8 Likes

MT’s guide to playing ZSS:

1: Wait for Indi to get close

2: grab into up throw

3: up air

4: repeat

2 Likes

Coincidentally, I can now publish Indi’s guide to fighting MT

  1. Approach MT

  2. Get thrown

  3. Get up air’d

  4. Do the exact same thing over again because it worked so well the first time

-MT

7 Likes

Fite me IRL n00b.

This is an informative topic on MT’s play style for every game.

I bet he picks Ryu and spams QC+P, and noobtubes with danger close and OMA in MW2

If you pick anyone besides M. Bison in Street Fighter, you’re playing it wrong

-MT

1 Like