Reimagining of the Bionicle Story!

So, this is a story I’m workking on that will retell the Bionicle saga, but with a few changes (some major, some minor)… So, without further ado, here is Bionicle: Reimagined… Chapter 1.

The red-armored being opened his eyes for the first time in a thousand years. He saw an endless sheet of blue, with not a single cloud to interrupt it. He slowly got to his feet, his muscles aching as they moved. Once standing, the being looked around at his surroundings. He was on a beach, it’s plains of sand gleaming in the sun. Behind him was a large tube covered in moss and debris, floating on the ocean. In front of him was a sculpture of a face that was mechanical in nature, but seemed organic in some way. The being imagined that that probably described himself too. At his feet were a few objects made of red metal. Two were shaped like blades, designed to look like flames. The other was a rounded helmet shape with a large circle that laid over the mouth and three gashes in each cheek. The being first turned to the two flame blades. Picking them up, he noticed grooves and protrusions in them that seemed to correspond with each other. After he fit them together, the newly formed sword glowed to life, flames leaping from it with such heat that it fused the sand below the being’s feet into glass. He noted that he himself did not feel the heat. Putting that thought aside, he turned to the mask. He put the sword on the ground and picked up the mask, slowly putting it on. His body violently shook as energy filled it. He now felt powerful, and with the power came a name. His name. Tahu.
Out of the corner of his eye he saw movement. Igniting his sword, he spun around. Before him was a small being with red armor. He wore a mask like Tahu’s in shape, but his was a bright yellow. The small being also carried a spear and a shield. Behind the lead being, there were 5 more, each with a different color scheme and mask. The small beings were staring at him intently, making Tahu a bit uncomfortable.
“Hello?” Tahu said nervously. While these beings were small, he sensed they knew how to fight, and he wasn’t sure if he did. Speaking seemed to get the lead being’s attention.
“Oh. Forgive me, Toa Tahu. It’s just that we have waited so long for you to arrive. I am Jaller, Captain of the Guard of Ta-Koro. These are my Matoran, Kapura, Kahi, Agni, Kalama, and Nuhrii.” The lead being spoke, and Tahu thought he detected pride behind Jaller’s words.
“You were expecting me?” Tahu asked.
Jaller nodded as he spoke “Yes. Turaga Vakama told us that you and the others would arrive someday to save us from the Makuta.”
As soon as the word “Makuta” left the small being’s mouth, a flood of thoughts entered Tahu’s mind. A slug crawling across a stone floor. A swarm of insectoid creatures destroying a mountain. A dark, twisted version of his own mask. Two glowing red eyes surrounded by darkness. He snapped back to reality with a start. He noticed that he had fallen to the ground, and the Matoran had gathered around him, worried expressions on their faces.
“What happened?” the Toa asked.
“We don’t know. You just collapsed.” Jaller said. “We were hoping you could tell us what happened.”
Tahu thought on this for a moment before standing up and walking away. After a few feet, he turned to look at the Matoran. “Which way to Ta-Koro?” he asked. The Matoran pointed towards a field of charred grass, and Tahu stalked off into the distance.

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oh yeah, critiques would be nice.

This is really good! I like the word choice. I can see this going places.

Oh, and that mention of Kahi as a Ta-Koro guard was pretty cool. :stuck_out_tongue:

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thanks.

Chapter 2 of Bionicle: Reimagined. In this chapter, I introduce Lewa and Matau, and touch upon a character that will be very important in one of the major changes I’m making

Lewa, Toa of air, flew through a jungle, swinging from vine to vine. He couldn’t remember ever feeling so free. Of course, he couldn’t remember much at all. He did a final flip through the air and landed on a branch, following up by dropping to the ground. He looked around. There was a river running beside him, its silvery blue waves lapping up against the verdant shore. He then realized that he was being watched. Lewa spun around to see two small figures staring at him. The figures were small, and one had a leather sack that he was filling with water. They wore green armor like Lewa, but their masks were different. One had a large flat, mask, and the other wore the same mask as Lewa, but in a bright shade of gold.
“Uh…. Hi there.” Lewa said cheerfully. “What are your names, little ones? I am Lewa, Mystery-King of Knownothingness.”
The one with the flat mask spoke first. “I am Tamaru.” “And I’m Eljay!” the Golden-masked Matoran answered. “What can we do for you, Toa-hero?”
“Could you point me in the direction of Le-Koro? A Matoran named Kongu pointed me towards it, but I seem to have become path-lost.” The air-toa explained.
The two Matoran looked at each other and then Eljay pointed upwards. Lewa’s gaze followed the direction until he saw platforms of wood interwoven with grass huts and trees, some branches even serving as pathways. Matoran were visible, all with the green armor that designated a Le-Matoran. Lewas quickly thanked the two villagers before somersaulting into the air and gliding to the village.
He landed gracefully upon a platform, and found that the Matoran were celebrating something. They were dancing and singing quite loudly, and Lewa silently wondered how the wooden platforms could support such rambunctious activity.
“Hello.” Lewa said quietly. All eyes turned to him as everything went silent. Then the party erupted again, louder than before. A new being, taller than the Matoran, but shorter than Lewa walked forward. His mask was curved at the top like Lewa’s, but had intricate detail instead of the wide grin of the toa’s.
“Greetings, Toa-hero. I am Turaga Matau, leader of Le-Koro. You have arrived at a much cheerhappy moment. We were just celebrating a victory over the Makuta.” The being said.
“The Makuta… yes, Kongu told me of him. Verybad tales.” Lewa turned to face the Matoran. “But neverfear! I will protect you to my last breath. You have no more to worryfear from Makuta.” Lewa shouted. A loud cheer erupted from the Matoran. Lewa smiled as he turned back to Matau. “So, where do I find this Makuta?”
Matau shook his head. “You cannot defeat him alone. You will need the others’ help, and even then your power will not be enough. Your elemental energy is focused by your Kanohi mask, making you powerful, yes, but one mask will not be enough…”

Onua’s next. should have his chapter up tommorow!

or maybe not. I thought I would have time to write today, but I didn’t. Tomorrow for sure (I’m going to regret saying that.)

@Matoro Make more of this! It’s friggin good!