Chronicles of Freyah: Chapter 1

This is Toa Aquaris. I recently came across a massive collection of journals and books in my friend Freyah's room. She isn't here anymore, but I can at least share her knowledge.

Chapter 1
My Name is Freyah, I am the last known inhabitant of Damia, a land not far of from Athe-Nui, my friend Aquaris's home. I should probably assume you don't know anything about Athe-Nui and its history. I'll start from the top.
Most creatures know about the tales of Makuta, the Toa, Mata Nui, and the Matoran Universe. People accept that after that, nothing much happened on Spherus Magna. But that assumption is incorrect, you see, there is an ocean dubbed Mara-Nui, or Great Sea is you don't speak Matoran. In that sea there are islands just like in any sea. The chain of islands I'll be talking about is nicknamed "The Foot" because of it's shape. Well, that's what people think. The wise ones told me otherwise.
Anyhow, on the southernmost tip of this chain of islands is an island named Athe-Nui. Athe-Nui is has a large bay on the western side, and a tip that flows into two stretched out looking islands on the other side.
Athe-Nui is divided into 11 regions. There are eight elemental regions on the main landmass: Earth, Fire, Water, Air, Lightning, Ice, Stone, and Light. There's a collection of islands in the bay that are called Te-Wahi, or the Sky Region. The two islands off the coast of the eastern tip of Athe-Nui are Cordak and Suva.

Alright, now that we've got that outta the way, let's talk about me. I was created decades ago by... something, I don't actually know what I was created by. Huh, I dunno. Anyway, my first memories are on Damia. I was alone and learned that it was all I could do to survive on Damia when there were massive beasts like Gorats (Great, monstrous, rat-like fellows), and other Rahi about. I quickly learned how to fight, and started to explore my home. I had explored every inch of it before I came up with the idea of seeing what lay beyond the horizon. I built a boat and sailed away, and eventually came across a new land. It was barren, and there were few entities there other than the occasional random animal. I came across a small encampment, and found a small band of Agori and Glatorian that had abandoned their people to become nomadic. They taught me about the Legends of Bionicle, and trained me to become a true warrior.
But one day I woke up, and they all were -

The page tore there, but tell me what you think in the coments.

2 Likes

This is.

A very short chapter.

But your grammar and writing isn't half bad. Get a bit more of the actual literature in there and you'll be off to a great start.

1 Like

It's supposed to be more of a journalish thing. Thanks for the support. The reason it is so short is because its supposed to be torn and I'm lazy xD

Fair enough. Just make future chapters longer and you should be good.

This feels more like a prologue/world setup anyway.

Pretty nice, would be cool to have a crossover with the toa Mata and nuva

Thats actually pretty nice, I like how you integrated the end of G1 into a kinda mythology too.

@Ekorak Yeah, that's kinda what I was aiming for ya know? Giving future stories more context.

@AwesomeJoel27 Thanks!

@LTVmocs I dunno, maybe in the future but for now I kind of want it to be my own story. Also, those are such renowned characters people would get really pissed at me if I didn't do it right xD.

Edited for Triple Post - Waj