I never let a good organ go to waste.
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You play the piano too? Truly a polymath.
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I am a man of many talents.
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Toht? The One… Hwo Trusts?
I refuse to believe that the real world Tott is anyone but Danny DeVito
9 Likes
–
Chapter 7
–
“So.”
“So?”
“Sooo… El Cadáver Tonto.”
El cadáver tonto turned around and looked Winger dead in the… Well, helmet with no visible features. “…What?”
“I mean, that’s a pretty contrived name.” Winger continued, trying to evenly split his focus between his strange host leading the path through the dark and not stepping on any potential unknown objects - when traveling through a sewer, taking it safe is far easier than gambling whatever objects in your path are safe to step in.
“I didn’t come up with it, if that’s what you mean.” The skeletal host began walking backwards in order to maintain eye contact. “It was my roommate’s idea, along with the whole skeleton getup. He really sold it to me - The Masterful Skeleton, champion of the ring. Plus it reflected my roots.”
“You were a skeleton before this?” Cordax leaned past winger in order to interject, making it harder for Racie to walk on her own.
“What?” El cadáver tonto somehow raised a cranial brow in response. “I don’t… No, I worked in a mexican restaurant. And it’s a spanish name, so…”
Cordax was clearly unsatisfied, leaning in further and nearly tripping Winger. “What were you called before that?”
“I was , um…” He turned away for a brief moment. “I was on the breakfast crew… As the Maestro de Gofres.”
“Gofers?” Cordax wondered aloud, earning him a sharp glare from the emaciated emissary which only served to embolden the pint-sized punk. “So Gofers, where are we headed in this dark, rancid place?”
The Maestro de Gofres sighed in reply, not noticing Cordax cackle briefly. “Where are we going for? You get it, because go-for and go-fer are-”
“Better question.” Winger stepped in front of Cordax’s line of sight, killing the mood. “Tott got hit by something small and blue back in the alley where you were supposed to have fought, and since you seem to be familiarized with the underbelly of this place, maybe you’d know what that was.”
“Aha!” The Maestro de Gofres stopped and spun around to face the group, clapping his bny hands together and creating an unusual sound. “That’s funny,” He said, repeating the motion a few times. “Gonna have to get used to that.”
“Right, so, what your friend- you?” He pointed at Cordax, who shook his head vehemently. “Right. So another friend of yours, he got hit with something called a Tear - y’know, the thing people cry when they’re sad. They’re said to come from the weeping mirror, a thing rumored to exist somewhere under the city. Volume might know where it is, but uh…”
“Yeah, we know.” Winger replied, pushing the Maestro de Gofres out of the way and walking onward. “Just let us know when we get to where we’re headed.”
The ground beneath Winger suddenly wasn’t there, his foot entering a shadow and suddenly finding there was no floor to stand on. His other foot followed suit, and his collar suddenly tightened as he was held in midair above the sudden dropoff. The Maestro de Gofres, now standing behind him, took a moment to process what had just happened in the expected manner of stammering and looking around both at his new-found position and the son of Ghid he held in his grip.
“Huh.” Winger choked, tapping at the Maestro de Gofres’ arm and motioning for him to place him down. “So that’s how that works.”
“Sorry, I… wow.” The ghastly guide breathed, still trying to recover. “I should’ve had this raised in anticipation, but I guess I didn’t think about it. Uh, sorry, this’ll be a second.”
Crossing the gap of stagnant rainwater in the middle of the path, the Maestro de Gofres cupped his skeletal hand over his mouth and leaned towards an open pipe.
“HEY, I’M BACK, WE GOT A FEW PEOPLE HERE WHO’D LIKE SOME HELP, COULD YOU OPEN THE DOOR?”
“It helps him 'cause he doesn’t have ears.” He explained, turning back to the group which was all partaking in clutching each of their respective ears and recoiling as the noise rang throughout all the surrounding pipes and reverberated loudly through them. “Oh, I just realized I don’t either. Huh. I wonder how I can hear things without ears?”
“Shut up or I will hurt you.” Winger jammed his helmet into the Maestro de Gofres’ bony face and breathed the sentence out in pure venomous malice. Before any rebuttal could be made, or the latter of the pair become any more traumatized by the promise, there was a rumbling grinding of gears, and the floor beneath the dropoff began to rise, slowly ascending with the area beyond it turning itself about in numerous ways until, at last, a doorway presented itself.
“Ungrateful.” The rigor mortis reincarnate made a spitting motion as he approached the doorframe, stopping in surprise for a moment as he realized he had no saliva. “This is so weird. Is this like, um, temporary?”
“Not that I’m aware of.” Winger said, walking forward to meet his placement at the front of the group. “But I imagine it sucks to be dead.”
Cordax, who was still supporting Racie, who was mostly leaning her elbow on Cordax’s head as she didn’t really need the support, gasped and turned to Racie, almost causing her elbow to slip off his curved cranium. “I think he’s a Dreamer!”
Racie silently pretended she hadn’t heard him.
The path quickly led to a well-lit area containing an extremely old television, a worn couch, and a misused mini fridge, all of which were bolted to the floor. A neon sign reading ‘TACO’ hung on the wall, slightly askew, and glowing a brilliant yellow light. As the group approached, the Maestro de Gofres approached and waved at the sign.
“Hi, sorry I’m late. Had to bring this whole group in, uh, the dude’s got a concussion and the lady’s got something but I’m not sure. Uh, I think the kid’s fine though.”
There was a silent few seconds which passed. “Uh, you trying to be inconspicuous or whatever, this is atypical of you man, you there?”
“Are you serious right now?” The sign replied.
“What?” The Maestro de Gofres replied. “I thought we were supposed to help people and stuff, considering-”
“Later, hot pockets.” The sign dimmed, thousands of little sparks of light seeping out of the empty neon tubes and flying slowly into a cloud above the group. “How’re you, Cordax? And what’s-her-face, I’ve missed both you clods.”
–
5 Likes
Losing my identity Wondering have I gone insane
You and your expectations 
When the Ultimate BoTLDR theorizeristerizon wireless doesn’t make a theory
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/935989994735169546/1065815743872118804/kxHr4oZiBkowS8A4.mp4
Much unlike that thing you showed me in pm (it was a sketch)
you may have a point
4 Likes
He’s just like me for real for real
To find the truth in front of me I must climb this mountain range
It’s funny how we started with Metal Gear Rising soundtracks, went through classic songs from the previous century, stupid meme songs and certified internet classics, and then circled all the way back to Metal Gear Rising soundtracks.
Not surprising, considering that it’s quite literally the best video game in existence. I should probably build a MOC based on it sometime in the future
Now I am convinced that you named all these books with these specific words just so that you could make this, just like I am convinced that you manipulated a bunch of people into organising the Dark Hunter collab, one of the biggest Lego collabs in existence just so that you could make that “charger” joke
Each time you make these more and more inconvenient to open. If you don’t make a link to a google doc with ten different links in it, only one of which actually leads to the proper gif/video, and all the other ones are either amogus memes or Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley next time, I will be very disappointed
Im ded bruh
It was a long wait not as long as when I disappeared for a few months though , but luckily this one’s a real chonker I’m never saying that word again ever
I don’t like using the same meme several times in a short time period, but a little trolling was done to him
According to such a trustworthy source as google translate, this means Master of Waffles, which in turn confirms my theory that the Foolish Corpse is ToaNoah_Wafflemeister, which in turn means that woooo yeah I was right!
Time for another celebratory dance
You know I’ve been on fire with these theories lately, now I almost live up to the stupid cringe title I narcissisticly (this is a real word now btw) gave myself
Maaan even the silvery stooge did a better job at threatening people, which is a very low standard by itself wunger please come back
Here’s a little nit pic k:
Racine’s and Cordax’s names are used too many times in a row here. I believe it’s called tautology, but what do I know, I’m nearly illiterate. We should probably ask @Willess12, who seems to be really good at picking your writing apart.
Speaking of the last line though, there’s definitely something with Gracie and Dreamers. She do be behavin Super Unusually Secretive.
Wow that’s really crazy! Some could even say that it’s kinda… wild
Wow. That’s… beautiful.
Now we shall turn it into an NFT to scam people with, just like that big famous and definitely not controversial youtuber called pogan laul or something. That way we’ll earn enough money to afford an actual competent artist (not me) to make the BoTLDRG H I D D O N comic books real
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Looking downward from this deadly height And never realizing why I fight
look man the guy behind charger left the collab I had to do something
no wait I mean uh
Man I was sure it would load on the site 
most times the .mp4s embed
I guess it’s just the hide details function breaking them 
we_do_a_little_trolling.mp4
ysee NotaHffan
I did that on purpose
Next time we see this group… Nah, I won’t say what I’m gonna do, the clues exist already
lol I stole it from online and modified it to be ghid
anyway this is notahffan when he finishes reading the chapter and has written down his theories fr fr
4 Likes
The time has come to an end Yeah, this is what nature planned
No, you clearly manipulated him so that you could make that charger joke, so
Wait waht? Is The foolish corpse actually not ToaNoah? I don’t believe that.
ysee Ghid Mc’Gick
I don’t believe you
I don’t bel- uh I mean Tarnish vented through the floor, now they’re gonna meet and there will be violence
Imagine opening this little hide details thingy and expecting to see legitimate theories bruh 
Like with all NFTs, stealing is the only proper way to deal with them
Anyways this is notahffhfhan when his ridiculous ramblings don’t get faved
8 Likes
that wasn’t gunk
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So, apparently Monopoly is back in this book…
Completely unrelated to that fact, here’s a new drawing of him I spontaneously made today:
This was done mainly as a practice piece for character design. I’m usually not very good at designing cool-looking costumes for my characters, so I thought I’d test out a few things on this guy.
I’ve already drawn a rendition of this particular Monopoly design a loooong while ago as a part of my BoR book cover, but that thing is very outdated now, so I thought I’d give some of these characters new, updated looks
15 Likes
BoR forever
5 Likes
Ooh, this looks very nice
the sketched lines and green accents adds so much to the character and really shows Monopoly’s personality in the books. I can’t wait to see more art in this style
5 Likes
That’s…
That’s so freaking sick…
6 Likes
Do you mean… BoR-ever? 
I hate myself
I’m quite satisfied with this style, so you best believe there’s more to come
11 Likes
–
Chapter 8
–
It was a frightening sight, looking out over what once had been a densely-packed city now consisting of a sizzling heatwave which radiated off every surface, the surrounding city framed eerily in the twisted streetlights warped from the flash of light and warmth into curled, wilting caricatures of themselves. Out in the city streets were a number of yellow lights, all of which were turned towards the building which Renner occupied.
Renner, however, could care less at the moment what the rest of the world looked like. Dashing forwards, he peppered Monopoly with a flurry of light blows as he passed, finally tossing the carpet piece to Diero’s confined form which burst forth effortlessly from the ground the moment his jaws touched it.
Monopoly had staggered slightly from Renner’s attack, but as Diero moved in for the kill, Monopoly suddenly swung out and decked the bony bodyguard with a retreating left hook to the jaw. In just a moment Diero was back up, but after kneeing towards his face fell again to a hook from the right.
“Fantastic.” The glowing orb of Monopoly’s consciousness looked at his hands. “I knew this was going to give me an edge.” He moved in, but reacted too slowly to Diero’s sharp kick, which dug into his shin and tripped him slightly, giving the cadaverous cowpoke the opportunity to roll aside and bolt for his boss.
Renner’s armor shifted from a speed-focused form to one with durable gauntlets, leaving him completely open for Diero to grab by the stomach as he dashed for the door. The little Ghid grabbed the deadsperado’s ankle as he passed, and the trio were propelled by Diero’s efforts down the tiny hall and out the door at the end, which flew off its hinges when presented with Diero’s elbow.
“That- Enough!” Renner growled, worming around in Diero’s grip. “We had him there; we could’ve taken him on, and- and stopped him!”
“He knocked me down, boss.” Diero replied, effortlessly scaling a nearby building and sprinting across the rooftops. “You wrote to keep you safe, right? Can’t do that if I’m dropping with every hit he lands. Now don’t let your decking the tall guy color your vision or muddle your memory of being nearly killed by him before. This ain’t our fight-”
Diero spun out suddenly as a shingle slid beneath his foot. The pair went flying for a moment, but Diero’s momentum enabled him to catch his heel in a gutter and gently set Renner down on the edge of the roof as he himself smashed into the rest of the gutter and hit the ground below. Renner didn’t even bother looking at Diero’s impact, or wince at the severity of it, for his mind was too busy comprehending what his loyal lummox had informed him of.
He had died. Now that it had been mentioned to him, his memory of the event was becoming clearer and clearer. He hadn’t nearly been killed , he was killed - Monopoly had ripped his mechanical spine out during the cider factory chase. The gap in memory of him actually dying was a painful hole to consider, as one moment his life was trickling out, and the next he was completely renewed, as if the brutal evisceration of his body had never taken place and the memory of it had been lost.
Diero had clawed his way back up by this point, but Renner’s solemn appearance held his hypothetical tongue. He levered himself over the edge of the roof and sat, slouching forwards and feeling about for another cigar as he waited for his boss to speak.
“You think he can see us?” The anodize airhead wondered, looking up towards the circle of the moon which glowed above the darkened city, the only major source of light in the area.
“Hmm?” Diero replied, looking at Renner with one eye while his other socket was busy having the end of his cigar stuck into it. He pulled it out and puffed at the other end, seemingly unbothered about Renner’s now revolted expression. “Tott did this the other day, and I figured it might work well for cigars too. Hey, it’s cost effective, and- look, I’m out of matches, okay?” Diero droned in irritation as his boss still held a look of repulsion on his features.
“Yeah um.” Renner pointed upwards.
“Oh, right… Him.” The cow-poking clodpoll gazed upwards, leaning back and resting one arm underneath his bony noggin. “I don’t know, but there’s an awful lot of him up there. I bet he’s just wishin’ that card’ll get to him faster and bring the whole lot of 'im down here. You reckon that’s what he’s up to?”
“You know,” Renner leaned forward on his knees and stared at the ugly rooftops in the darkness. “I don’t think anyone in the world really believes you speak like that.”
“'Fraid I do,” Diero spun the cigar in his fingers, ash flinging in every direction. “You recall my rich, varied history b’fore I up an’ met you?”
“Yes,” Renner gripped the sides of his head. “Please write a book so I don’t have to re-listen to any of it.”
Diero shrugged in reply, and kept staring upwards. There was silence yet again broken only by Diero’s hat scraping against the shingles as he shifted it side to side, over and over.
“What.” Renner finally asked, growing tired of the motion, but suddenly snapped his head towards the sky before Diero could answer. It was a ragged tear-like shape in the sky, the darkness inside it just ever so slightly darker than the night it was framed against.
“Book,” He began, straining as he slowly stood. “There’s a great big hole in the sky, and sooner or later someone’s going to come taking advantage of it. Diero, we need to get up there right now.” Renner hopped off the roof and walked a few steps, turning around for Diero to follow.
He followed by slumping forward and landing in a pile, his head covered by a plastic bag. Renner braced himself as the silhouette of a figure appeared, holding the deadsperado’s hat in one hand and a shining pistol in the other.
“Zippy has commanded all survivors of the wreck be arrested at once.” The officer deadpanned, his blue Pakari reflecting the yellow light of the Dreamers’ eyes which appeared like sudden sparks from the dark of the alleyway. “I’m sorry, sir, but I’m placing you under arrest.”
I looked away for a moment.
One thousand and one bodies. All but one are Dreamers. The card is only a minute away.
…
5 Likes
Welcome to your final test I'm MrBeast
this whole chapter took so long I forgot how I was going to reply to all of these
what a fine gentleman I am sure he would never gouge a robot’s eyes out and turn him into a rectangle
I really love this artstyle, it’s gritty and in-your-face. Works really well for a rough and tumble character like Monopoly.
ok never mind the art sucks
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I exist
finally, I’m all caught up
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We can scrap the “S” cuz I’ve never missed a beat
I’m sure that no less than one skeleton gif was going to be involved in there
You know I’ve been waiting for a while for these three to fight, especially Monopoly and Renner, ever since Monopoly the user dropped this absolute gem:
Such a shame that the battle didn’t last long and nobody got hurt (surprisingly) this time. Well, I doubt that Monopoly will let them go so easily (he did break into the room for a reason, right?), so hopefully the beatdown fight will continue.
Also, the other thing thing that surprises me is that Diero did not pick up Mc’Gick’s gun after cracking his head like an egg. I thought it was a perfect opportunity to give Diero at least one new revolver, as him having none just doesn’t feel right.
I love it when the characters start having an existential crisis after realising that they had been killed by Monopoly
Ahhh the good old days
BoB (the Book of Bones)
I would like to praise you for the clever way you tied this all to the previous paragraph using the word “follow”, but I won’t because I don’t want you to destroy any more electronic devices 
I’m quite surprised that this method of taking out dreamers hadn’t been used by anyone before. It instantly puts out the flame in a dreamer’s head and it’s impossible to reignite it without taking off the bag, meaning that Renner is probably going to face off against a hoard of police-controlled dreamers all by himself
New theory: I have been informed that Ghid’s eyes are, in fact, orange, meaning that these Dreamers are most certainly not, in fact, a Ghid. listen man I don’t really have any theories for now
Finally!
All but one? Does that mean the real real Ghid was in the factory when Diero did the card thing back in BoD? I guess we will find out soon.
Ghid, is this pun really BoT -hering you so much? 
Why am I doing this to myself
Ayy you’re back! I was wondering why you haven’t been active in this topic for a while
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