Well little Johnny, cause Pluto got done dirty
Why am I named Johnny?
Because Iām not creative at naming things.
Why does rain happen?
Well little Johnny the sky is crying because it has the misfortune of witnessing your face everyday.
Why do goldfish exist
Well Little Johnny, one day a yellow fish went into a pile of gold and came out gold.
Why do I have a nose?
Well little Johnny, because I need something to break when I punch your face.
Whereād my bonkles go?
Well little Johnny I stole them.
Why do birds chirp
Well little Johnny why is a good question. Itās one of lifeās great mysteries isnāt it? Why are we here? I mean, are we the product of some cosmic coincidence, or is there really a God watching everything? You know, with a plan for us and stuff. I donāt know, man, but it keeps me up at night.
Why did I know exactly how to answer this question
Well little Johnny, you were born with a special tumour that takes control of you anytime someone asks a question. That tumour is passed down through the generations and carries all knowledge.
Why does time change depending on the country Iām in?
Because when everyone was beginning their countryās they didnāt talk to each otherās, so thatās why different countries have different times and languages
Why do mountains exist?
1 Like
You see, lil johnny, when two tectonic plaques love each other very much, the hit each other and with the full power of continents colliding a mountain is formed
Why do I see unicorns when you cook mushrooms?
1 Like
Well little Johnny itās because the unicorns are trapped in the mushrooms so when the mushrooms are cooked they can get out
Why do birds fly?
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Well Little Johnny, itās because their deathly afraid of the ground. You notice how they perch in trees and not on the dirt? Same reasoning.
If youāre falling in a forest, and nobodyās around, do you ever really crash or even make a sound?
Well little Johnny, is it really depends on your weight, so get good and fat or no one will find you when you fall.
What is the state of this community?
Well little Johnny, itās just like love; it isnāt canon 
Can I be an astronaut?
Well Little Johnny, give me a second to tune up my trebuchet, weāll check.
If the moonās made of cheese, what is the sun made out of?
3 Likes
Well little Johnny, the sun is really spicy queso
Where am I?
well little johnny, itās not a matter of where you are, but when you are where you are.
What did I just say?
Well little Johnny, you took a tab of acid before typing so no one really knows.
Why are American Spirits good for me?
Well little Johnny ghosts arenāt usually good for your health.
Why do I exist.