As I prepared for my 872nd posing in the mirror today I noticed the shirt pocket I had placed my toffee bar in had a cavernous hole of flesh in my chest directly behind it…
Horrified, I immediately filled it with toffee bars, appalled that I did not take advantage of this extra storage space sooner.
“Now where could my pipe be?”, Jon Arbuckle wondered aloud.
“Garfield!”, Jon said in anguish, knowing his feline companion had once again stolen his most prized possesion.
“Man this bag is heavy as a rock!”
“Go figure”, said Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson who had been stuffed inside said bag moments prior.
Something strange stirred inside me.
Step number two of “How to eat a witch” suddenly made sense.
“Roses are red, Police lights are blue,” said the computer terminal. “Uh oh, there’s a missing semicolon on line 32 of paragraph 74, §341.32.21, and it appears that the entire facility is entering lockdown due to your negligence.”
“One hamburger, please.”
The KFC employee looked back at me in misery.
“Look that woman is pregnant!” I said pointing to the woman who had, months ago, accidentally swallowed watermelon seeds.
I looked at the above post by Chronicler.
To my horror, I saw only one sentence.
My date suggested we watch movies.
We watched the Twilight saga.
I opened the order I had received in the mail. It contained a distinct lack of items.
I looked through Boards topics, hoping to find something of interest. Unfortunately, this thread was on the top.
I turned on the TV, expecting only the dullness of ads and the news. Instead, I saw well-armed government troops outside a suspiciously familiar building…
“You should have seen the other guy”
My bathroom mirror is smashed and I have glass in my hands
The Boards were doing fine in terms of entertainment for users.
Suddenly, this thread was brought back.
“What is that?” Mr Wonka said.
“It is the Unknown!”
Once, I kissed a girl. I later found out that that girl was me.
Lines up surprisingly well.
I looked for a Togav post from @Winterstorm345.
There was none…
I stared into the abyss. Then I tripped on a bug and fell in.
I can’t see an end, I have no control, and I don’t think there’s any escape(end of sentence)
Time for a new keyboard(end of sentence)