(GAME) Resume Padding

Don’t hire me

I can navigate my house in the dark


I have an outstanding memory, for example, I am capable of navigating my place of residence when it is in the complete darkness of the night

I play Roblox

I play a game that involves the creation and interaction with other players’ games, often in ways that can invoke server disruptions. Fire me soon.

I can fly.

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I am either a troll, a liar, or both. Ask about it in the interview just to see what hilarity ensues.

I broke a CNC bit

I broke an expensive piece of machinery despite this piece of machinery being a common tool in my preferred trade, damaging my reputation in the field in the future.

I was drinking hot cocoa and burned my tongue.


Whilst consuming a fluid comprised of liquidized cocoa beans and a sugar product, the heating properties of the beverage transferred onto my lingua, injuring it greatly. However, I survived this horrific incident, and I am here now despite the immense pain I felt in that moment.

I like coloring with crayola crayons.


I am a childish dolt who considers the excessive grinding of petroleum products upon paper a useful pastime. Fire me now.

I can say “supercalifragilisticexpialidocious” ten times faster than Eminem.

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Excessive training has allowed me to utilize my tongue in a manner so that i may speak large and nonsensical words at a rate superior in speed to a famous musician known for his lyrical prowess.

I know Franz Schubert’s “Die Forelle” song off by heart

I have had nothing better to do for six hours.

I know how to do a backflip.

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I know how to do a backflip

I keep potted plants

I preserve the life of one of trillion different living organisms that feed through autotrophic nutrition, and sustain them each day, no matter the cost.

I play dead by daylight.


I appear to be among the dead once the sun has risen. However, by evening I have become capable of doing work.

I’m not dumb.

I am not of lower intelligence. Some have even complimented me on my exceedingly average intelligence.

I stubbed my toe while watering my spice garden and I only cried for 20 minutes.


Whilst cultivating a magnificent collection of several different plants, I severely injured my largest toe. Although such a pain is tremendous, I only excreted liquid from my oculos for less than 1/87600 of a decade.

I make model trains.