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Chapter 6
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“Wake the heck up, samurai. We have a ghid to crawl into.”
It was a cold, windy day in Florida. The city streets were filled with nothing but utter silence. Mr Thomas Morrow was sitting at an outdoors cafe table, slowly sipping coffee from a large cup. The drink was horrible: tasting nothing like the actual caffeine-filled brew, it was more akin to liquid, lukewarm mud, but mr Morrow was too preoccupied with dark thoughts to notice that. “You can never get rest as a Grandmaster of Cringe…” he thought. “This job is going to drive me crazy! If I don’t find a way out of this situation, I’ll have to-”
His pessimistic train of thought was rudely interrupted because a man nonchalantly took a seat in front of him. Mr Morrow immediately recognised the man as none other than mr Cordax. It wasn’t all that hard, considering that Cordax had an exceptionally bizarre appearance. His skin was of a sickly yellowish colour and he wore a black fedora, which didn’t go well at all with his purple hoodie, but his most distinctive feature was his height: Cordax was no taller than a child. Sitting down, his head was barely visible above the table. Mr Cordax tipped his ridiculous hat:
“Hi, Tomorrow!”
“It’s “mister Morrow”, Thomas growled with frustration. “Is it really so hard to remember!?”
“Sorry loser uh I mean boss.” the tiny man murmured reluctantly. “I’ve got bad news: the impostor… the impostor is sus. Mc’Gick will be here soon to take us out.”
“I knew it… the amogus is real indeed.” mr Morrow’s voice trembled as he let out a sign. A horrifying realisation came to him: the meme grew like a tumour, made its way into their brains like a parasitic worm, infected them like a disease with no cure… they were doomed, mr Mc’Gick sensed the cringe and was on his way to cause violence.
Seeing his boss on the brink of breaking down in tears, Cordax tried to break the awkward silence instead:
“Have you ever heard the tragic story of Melissa Burgerwoman? Julie told it to me what I was-”
“Hwat in the world does it have to do with-” But mr Morrow was interrupted as well, because all of a sudden No One appeared out of No Where and spoke thus words:
“morbius truly has to be one of the films released in 2022 so far. jared leto did a job playing morbius and the action was in the film . the film has storytelling and the cgi was animated. the side characters were along with morbius and the villain was a bad guy. the jokes were sentences. this film really is one of the films . of all time, if not the last decade.”
Even more suddenly a tall figure appeared. It opened its two eyes and then it opened its two extra right eyes right on the right of the right eye that had been opened a few moments prior. It was mr Mc’Gick himself, the Not-So-High Emperor. He grabbed Morrow and Cordax by their collars, but he didn’t grab No One because he was nobody and spoke:
“You just posted cringe on main. And ghids are cruel, jack.”
Mc’Gick’s jaw unhinged as he forced the two into the darkness…
“Memes. The DNA of the soul”
— Monsoon, Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance
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9 Likes
it’s theorizin’ time
oh no
cordax has become a redditor
find the sus within ourselves
no need for a cure
time to decode the secret message hidden in the bold characters!
truly one of the writers of all time.
GUYS ITS HIM HES REAL HE FINALLY SHOWED UP
“no one in particular”
I CANT BELIEVE IT :0000000000 
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No you foolish fool you goofy goober you got the message of the entire chapter completely wrong. Read it again
I can neither confirm nor deny allegations that yes
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Chap. X21:
“Hey, yo, I got some good stuff for you guys!”
Cordax was jabbering again. The top-hatted guy beside him hooked his neck with his staff, and dragged him over to the store counter.
“He’d like $897.33 worth of Schär gluten-free rolls,” he said, producing a large check. The guy behind the counter grunted, and dropped a large crate over the counter, flattening Cordax. Zork laughed, then choked. The man had drawn a pencil, and was erasing the wall slowly. As he did, the meaning of the words changed, until they resembled dggdtsdgdgdhchxfxxvxvkjxgzysjdhzfy.
“Huh?”
Zork said, as the crowd cheered and sang the national anthem of Volume. A red glow filled the sky as the cider factory detonated into a ball of plasma, which was immediately consumed by Sonus.
“I just want to thank everyone for their patience and support in this difficult situation,” Ghid said throughout the night. “We have been very grateful to everyone involved and we are looking for a new home for our son Winger in this city. If you have any suggestions, please contact us at 555-321-7890. I’m here to help in anyway I can!”
Mike Rophone laughed. And laughed. And laughed some more. It was stupid. It was meaningless. It was… perfect.
This is more utter foolishness that should not be taken seriously. Ignore it.
1 Like
No, anything but an other m reference!
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even the zork characters are being siphoned into the Bo_____ universe
incredible
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dang, when did I last post here. This stuffs getting harder to follow than trapped in the closet.
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Cordax what have we done!? They’re multiplying now
Is this communism at its finest or an implication that Ghid is married?
What kind of OC is that
Heyzorks’s?
Okay. 
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you weren’t around for the cringe rp years of ttv, but it’s essentially a knockoff of the character gamemaster, a grating show host who focuses on violent dismemberment as penalty on said show
it was a bad time
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All years of TTV are cringe
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How can I do the dunkin’ if there’s no writin’?
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ok it’s theorizin’ time
In BoR, N01 says this:
Tott was the one who sent monopoly and the others to the factory, I believe.
This is less concrete, but in BoD, Ghid says this:
Tott is pretty much the main character, so these quotes mean that N01=Tott. This also means that because Tott=Ghid, than according to the law of equivalency, N01=Ghid.
BOOM
BOOM
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Well, not exactly, as far as I understand. Ghid was the one who did that, but that Ghid in particular was also the one who happened to have a Tott body among others (Volume, the Dreamers and, presumably, the original body).
So, technically this was Tott, but not quite.
I very much enjoy this idea. If we merge it with one of my theories
We get this: N01=Ghid=cat
Quite a horrifying revelation, if you ask me
Omg Ghid do be typin… I wonder what he is writhing hmmmmmmmmm 
8 Likes
POST 500.
A=/=The
Ghid is, in fact, someone
Not as horrifying as you being almost on the money with your musings about Diero and the foolish/idiot/silly corpse:
So close, man…
I was gonna say no, but I’ve decided that yes this was a welsh cowboy
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Actually not unrealistic, given the influx of immigrants in the 1800s.
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I had this perfect meme prepared to illustrate my concern about the lack of new chapters but
I ain’t happy, I’m feeling glad I got sunshine in a bag (OH MY GOD THE SUNSHINE HAS ESCAPED AND IS NOW MELTING PEOPLE TO THEIR BONES WAAAAHHHHHHHH)
But he didn’t exactly decay though, he just sort of, you know, melted
So they arrive and me confuse.
We’ve already established that these Dreamers are controlled by the Tott Ghid, they pretty much are the Tott Ghid, so why are they are fighting Sonus? We know that the Tott Ghid decided to capitulate. Are they fighting Sonus back to save their lives? Are they attacking him because the Tott Ghid changed his mind? Or is this just a show, an act put up by the Tott Ghid?
How much does Rac know about Dreamers? I thought that they weren’t exactly common knowledge in this world. While she traveled with Tott he didn’t explain what they are, but she must have overheard Renner and Diero mention them on the boat, so I guess she might have a very vague idea of what a Dreamer is, so wouldn’t it make more sense for her to call them “Ghid-looking things” or something, because a Dreamer is a term that she had briefly heard once or twice?
I’m probably being too picky with such unimportant details
Or maybe this is a setup for a plot twist that Racie had been the actual villain of the story all along, and I just cracked the biggest mystery of these books!?
Wasn’t his knife returned to him by Pakari and Bird along with Wunger’s gadgets before the faceoff against Volume?
Anyways, it’s really funny that Cordax is saying this, considering the one time when he threw a tantrum after a person got stabbed to death with it.
Very in-character for him.
I also find it incredibley funny that this was the first thing Winger asked the guy who had just gotten melted to death and then resurrected from Walhalla.
Seems like something he would 100% say. Again, very in-character
The skeleton gifs, my beloved, are now finally an official part of the book
This guy seems completely unfazed by the fact that his skin, blood and organs had completely melted off of his skeleton. He was more concerned about his clothes disappearing. Kinda weird, right?
I’m definitely reading too deep into this and being picky, come on, this was done for comedic purposes, you stupid genius of a book critic!
Please ignore this “criticism”
NEW USER LETS FREAKING GOOOOOO
They will surely have more than three lines and will not die a horrible death immediately
So, we’ve got a full character description now. No user resemblance has been spotted so far
Typical reddit mod habitat
This definitely isn’t foreshadowing
This is in top three Best Cordax Descriptions
My theorising skills almost got praised
Time for a celebratory dance
Classic NOTaHFfan:
-is onto something
-doesn’t follow through and stops right in the middle before reaching the desired conclusion
Like, I got the fact that Corpse’s “enhancements” were important and the creation process of Dreamers right, I just never connected the dots
We got welsh skeleton cowboy Diero, obama fried chicken Willess12… what other unholy abominations will our collective brains come up with?
Cool! I wanna be post 666
Just checked and it also looks like this is in your top three most liked topics right after BoD. Congrats man!
6 Likes
There's a star maaaaaaaan waiting in the sky
he ordered the swiss melt but asked to hold the swiss
?
I don’t see any Ghid-esqe details described. Can you cite any instance of Ghid-controlled Dreamers from before/BoD?
I cannot confirm or deny allegations that Rac knows anything about the dreamers
Now if we can only use this info of him being kinda weird to determine which user-
oh right.
I like how the chair morbs with him
look a discord user
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Misread this as boards members getting married, now I wanna see Rukah’s polish wedding in this story.
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who would rukah marry? 
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