Okay, until I can get home and show better pictures of the ones I actually own (which won’t be for another three-and-a-half hours, sadly), here’s a placeholder from the Interwebs (it’s the one in the back):
http://thumbs1.ebaystatic.com/d/l225/pict/231330411068_1.jpg
Hmm. That might be perfect if I can get some.
Alright, let me say.
This is better.
But, on the other hand, it still keeps a lot of the same issues which come from large MOCs.
This is a MOC by @Shadowgear6335. By my estimation it’s roughly the same size as Keravnos.
But, something you will notice is the armor all flows together, creating the feel of a smaller MOC, which has no need for awkward armoring techniques, while keeping the 16 inches of height that the MOC needs to tower over a Protector.
What I would say, as an experienced MOCer, is to either do a redesign of pretty much the entire torso and take a ton of smaller parts and armor pieces and fill in every single gap and also redesign the forearms, or to redesign the entire MOC on a smaller scale.
Systematic critique incoming!
LEGS (lower)
Probably the best part of this MOC, if I overlook how awkwardly thin they are and the random roborider head armor sticking out on the side. The shield piece could work very well, if they weren’t so flat from the side. If you want to use that large of an armor plate, you should also keep the legs as thick going in all directions.
6/10
LEGS (upper)
Decent. They still remain very exposed, however, and don’t flow with the lower legs at all.
6/10
WAIST
…not a fan. The armor doesn’t go all the way down to the hips, and it overall looks very exposed and gappy.
4/10
TORSO
This violates my #2 rule of MOCing, which is to never have two of any single piece of Pre-CCBS hip armor parallel to each other, and it violates it twice. The Inika thigh at the bottom is meh, but the two Inika thighs and two Metru thighs on the top of the torso just look bad, to me. The armor also doesn’t go out to the shoulders, leaving them incredibly flat and bare.
4/10
ARMS (upper)
The armor layering is very unusual, and leaves the Stars chestpiece too far out from the Metru foot.
5/10
ARMS (lower)
I think they might have been better before. While the use of the launcher as armor is creative, I don’t think it works here much at all. The shield is nice, though.
5/10
HEAD
I may be biased, but I have never liked the use of that armor plate as a face. Ever. The use of pistons as ear things is interesting, but I think they would be better if they were spikes.
6/10
OVERALL
Needs a lot of work. It has potential, and you have ideas, but right now I feel the MOC suffers too much from trying to be too big.
5/10
I don’t think it’s very fair that you’re comparing me to Shadowgear.
How is not fair? Hes a moccer, your a moccer, you can be compared.
Yeah, but Shadowgear is an expert.
So what? Just because hes an “expert” does not mean you cant be compared.
There is lots to be accounted for when you are critiquing a MOC, such as resources, skill, time spent, and I think Keravnos is right in assuming this isn’t exactly a fair comparison.
Ek was using it as an example of how to improve.
he’s not even comparing you…
That was a mere reference point.
The critique itself he gave was completely independent from Sovereign and any comparison between the two MOCs.
I feel Ekorak did an apt job giving fair critique.
Point take. Continue tearing my MOC to shreds.
@Ekorak Keep in mind that this may be the first time Keravnos has built a moc of this size, so let us also look at this from an unbiased perspective and a little more of a begin ners view.
@ToaKeravnos I am fairly new to moccing but I have gained a large amount of insight from this thread and others. The body is decent for the size of this moc and there is pretty decent coverage all around. The body may be a little uneven compared to the rest of the moc but that will come with experience, keep at it.
8/10
The upper arms are decent for keeping with the size of the rest of the moc, though maybe they could be brought in just a smidgen. The connector to the lower arm could probably be slightly bulkier to fit with the moc. If something can be added to the lower arm behind the inika blasters that would also help keep the flow going.
7.5/10
The legs are probable the weakest part of the moc from the lower legs down, but as ekorak said, try to bulk up the legs to fit the armor. A little bit more gold could also help disperse the color a little more.
7/10
The head is unique and carries an almost shaman like mysteriousness to it. You could tell this moc invokes a sense of unknown power.
9/10
Overall a 7.5/10, there are great ideas here, you just need a little more experience with this sort of scale. Keep at is mate.
P.S: I know these guys may seem a little harsh, but they are just trying to help you grow, albeit with various degrees and areas of experience throughout the group.
Hey, @charyas, @Ekorak, @Nyran, and everybody else, I’m sorry. I’m being hostile towards you all just because my MOCs are crappy. I just can’t think of any ways to “improve” him without completely scrapping him. I’m sorry.
You have potential.
http://images.mocpages.com/user_images/112952/1402183023m_DISPLAY.jpg
This is my Self-MOC from a previous era. He too, was intentionally quite large. I have, over time, found I’m more suited to a particular scale, that being a scale smaller than the official sets. My Self-MOC now is barely larger than a Protector.
This is the scale I currently build in. It’s a mix of pieces that allows for smaller characters. Ekorak is barely taller than my hand is long.
What you need to do, in my own opinion, is to reimagine your character slightly. Try making a new version of him entirely, while keeping this around as a reminder of the past. That’s what I did. The very original Ekorak is still around. I’ve improved far beyond his build, but he remains.
Here’s what I recommend. Make a new version on a smaller scale, focusing on making a bulkier, more solid character. Try some smaller custom limbs.
If you need some ideas, I have this quick, custom leg that hardly requires many parts at all, and could be made in Keravnos’ colors.
If I actually had potential I would probably make a smaller version.
Do not say that about yourself sir, you have more potential than you know. I have not posted my my self moc yet, but I can tell you he has elements not entirely my own. This moc has a custom head, a custom body, custom legs and arms that I have not seen on any other moc yet. you have good potential. Do not throw in the towel because of what we say sir, as we are also human. If nothing else, try with different scaling, be inspired by what you see around you sir. I know that you can create things that are great and wonderful, so do not lose hope in your talent, and please do not lose hope in us.
I haven’t lost hope in you. I’ve lost hope in myself.
Dude…that is the last thing you should ever say about yourself. @Baldric and @Ekorak are right, you have potential, and some of use think you’ve been living up to some of it pretty okay so far. Take their words of advice, no matter how harsh they may sound, and try to apply them as best you can. Ekorak wasn’t exactly all that kind to my Toa Hunter MOC in the beginning, either (at least, not the robot mode), but despite that, and the limited amount of parts I had left, I tried to apply as many improvements as I could, and I can safely say that now my Toa Hunter is much, much better than he ever used to be. Just…just consider yourself lucky Ek gave you so many suggestions to work with. He never gave any of my stuff a review that in-depth…
I just can’t think of any ways to improve him without scrapping months of work.
Sometimes that just tends to happen with MOCing. If you need to scrap anything, just try doing it with a few smaller aspects. If you’re told to scrap something huge that took a lot of effort, trying just following a bit of the advice and modifying the pre-existing part. You don’t know have to follow the suggestions word for word, just the best you can.