February 4th, 2015.
TTV Law Offices.
3:40 PM.
Kahi arrives at his office, to see it blocked off. A detective in white is there, investigating.
Kahi: Um, excuse me? That’s my office.
???: Well, you’re not allowed in here.
Kahi: What? Of course I am. Who are you to tell me no?
Waj: Name’s Waj. I’m the new detective around these parts. In Justice we TRUST!
Kahi: But I literally OWN this office! See my badge? I’m a lawyer.
Waj: Sorry, Kahi. I got specific orders from the prosecutor to not even let you NEAR the evidence!
Waj: May I remind you that you’re dealing with a PUBLIC official? See this badge? It’s mine. It’s shiny. It’s worth more than a Happy Meal.
Kahi: Who is this “prosecutor” you are working for? All the others allowed me to collect evidence!
Waj: Eljay of course. He’s the new guy, but man is he good at his job. He says he learned from the master of facts himself.
Waj: You’d better believe it! He told me specifically not to allow YOU from coming onto the premises! He told me that YOU tamper with evidence!
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Waj: I don’t know where Eljay currently is, but man I can tell you all about him!
Kahi: Well might as well do that. Who was this “Master of Facts.”
Waj: Mr. Von Canon of course. He taught Eljay how to determine if something was true or not. So basically, Eljay questions everything a defense attorney presents.
Kahi: So he was serious then. He’s really going all at it!
Waj: Yeah I know. He’s pretty great. Now please, leave the scene of the crime. I’m trying to investigate.
Waj: Eljay told me if anyone, ESPECIALLY YOU, tried to make deals with me that I needed to arrest you! Do you wanna be arrested?
Waj: You’re not a witness unless Eljay chose you to be one! Are we done yet?
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Waj: See ya, Kahi! IN JUSTICE WE TRUST!
Kahi: Oh wait, can I AT LEAST get a list of witnesses?
Waj: Sure. We have a Ms. Dee Viper and a Mr. Looch.
Kahi: Good to know. (I should probably interview Viper first.)
February 4th, 2016.
TTV Headquarters.
3:49 PM.
Kahi: This is the one I DON’T want to confront again… My own co-worker.
Kahi: Hello? Is anyone around?
Viper: Kahi.
Viper: No welcoming? What a shame. No I don’t.
Viper: You have no respect for a woman, do you? Just for that, I’m not gonna answer. At least ZAKTAN has respect for me.
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Viper: The past is the past. No need to worry about it. It’s like a moldy tomato. You just throw it away and don’t worry about it.
Kahi: Actually, it’s toe-MAE-toh, not toe-MAH-toe.
Viper: You wot mate?
Kahi: Just correcting you.
Viper: Oh, like when you tried to correct my love for Zaktan? Is that what this is about? It’s about Zaktan isn’t it?
Viper: I see. I get no love, no redemption in your eyes. I’m nothing but some Zaktan-obsessed fan.
Kahi: No-
Viper: Well guess what? I’ll show you… I’m gonna testify against Prpl. That way I can be special and be the ONLY female cast member!
Kahi: Oh come on, Viper. We all love you.
Viper: No… Only Zaktan loves me apparently. Now go off!
Oh come on. You guys can do better than that.
Kahi: No! I need to ask you a few questions!
Viper: Hmph. Very well. You won’t get much though.
Kahi: What is up with you? I thought you said you didn’t have a grudge.
Viper: Oh, I don’t. It’s Zaktan that has the grudge.
Kahi: (ARE YOU SERIOUS.)
Kahi: Where did you see the murder take place?
Viper: I was standing at the right window when I saw the law office building next door have an opened window. There I saw it: Prpl Dragon murdered Plural by decapitating him! It was horrifying… I could not believe such a thing would happen… I called the police shortly afterwards.
Viper: Personally, I couldn’t see much. The small details were not easy to look at.
Viper: I was in the main offices and was looking out the window to see it.
Viper: You’re just gonna have to listen to the testimony.
Viper: I have a clock-in. Here:
VIPER’S CLOCK IN:
8:20 PM to 8:40 PM.
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Viper: Nope.
Kahi: So you’re saying that DID happen?
Viper: Maybe… But I dunno, I shouldn’t tell you. I’m just a Zaktan-obsessed fangirl, aren’t I?
Kahi: UGH. You’re so hard to work with.
Viper: Well, i’ve told you enough already. Now scram! Run on over to your new friend or whatever. I don’t care. It’s not important.
~~
Shall we go visit Looch now?
February 4th, 2016
Sears.
3:57 PM
Kahi: (Well, this is the place I got from Waj. Hopefully he is here.)
shuffle
Kahi: Hey! Who is that behind the laundry machine?
???: You… I’ve seen you before!
Kahi: What?
???: You! You were that guy at Mesonak’s trial! You were terrible back there!
Looch: Name’s Looch, the most fabulous being on the planet. Unfortunately my waifu did not come with me to Sears. I’m always in need of a new Laundry Machine.
Kahi: (I seriously don’t want to know why.)
Looch: So what brings you here? Washing machine shopping as well?
Looch: Oh! A few questions? Hmm… Do I even have time for that? No. I’m busy shopping for laundry stuff. Carry on.
Looch: …
Kahi: Did I say too much?
Looch: Looks like someone has been digging his shovel too far into my secrets. You know, I could have my buddies 360 No Scope you right now, but I kinda like you. Sorta. Not really. I hate everyone.
Kahi: (Make up your mind.)
Looch: Regardless, you have no proof and I do not intend to go to the trial tomorrow whatsoever. I already cleared my name. Nobody but that weird purple-haired girl saw me in the room. At least, that’s according to me. You see, you can’t win. You couldn’t win from the beginning.
Kahi: Why do you have a problem with her purple hair when YOU have purple hair?
Looch: Technicalities.
Looch: Regardless, once you took down my men with that ridiculous thing you call a “trial” I just knew I had to do ALL the work myself.
Looch: Nobody’s gonna believe you anyways, so I’ll tell you. Everyone thinks I’m a weird rich weeaboo who goes around sears. Well, that’s partially it. But I also work under the Mafia, under the information sect. I want to know EVERYTHING about my enemies.
Kahi: Even Plural?
Looch: Yes, even that annoying little boy.
Kahi: What did you want out of him?
Looch: He had things I couldn’t have… Er, I won’t say it. Regardless, he stole that salt from the mafia and my packages of waffles, and he tried to make a buck off of my earnings. Nobody steals stuff from me. NOBODY.
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Looch: Oh yeah. I was gonna say, it was nice knowing you.
Kahi: What?
Looch: You didn’t expect this? What a bummer. I’m gonna call the police on you. You’re the one who MURDERED Prpl, not me.
Kahi: But I-
Looch: SNAKE! Take this man away! He murdered a woman last night!
Kahi: No I didn’t! Please!
Cops: Yeah yeah, whatever. You’re coming with us.
Kahi: NO! Please! You gotta believe me!
February 5th, 2016
Detention Center.
12:30 PM
Kahi: Ugh… What a night. I can’t believe I got drug into this. That idiot Looch… Blaming me for the murder. Now what am I gonna do? I can’t defend Prpl.
???: Yes you can, and you WILL.
Kahi: Who- who is there?
Eljay: I am, and I’m not letting YOU get charged for the murder. Especially when my detectives say you were COMPLETELY innocent. Therefore I have a warrant to let you go.
Kahi: Eljay… You know what is going on don’t you? That Looch guy! He is pure evil! You have to convict him now!
Eljay: … Just hurry up so you can get out of here.
Kahi: Eljay… You do know he did it right?
Eljay: Hmph. I’m just looking at the facts, Kahi. Regardless, you got a trial to get to.
Kahi: That fiend… He stopped my investigation. He got me arrested before I could figure out anything else!
Eljay: Please. Just get out of that cell and come here. You’re gonna be late for the trial.
Kahi: Will do.
February 5th
Defense Lobby #3
12:50 PM
##MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH
Kahi: What the heck?! Put away those snacks! Court is about to begin. Ugh. I’ve been stricken with tiredness.
Prpl: Why?
Prpl: Is it just me or did I find it comfy in the detention center?
Kahi: WHAT? Just-
Kahi: You’re not helping.
Prpl: Lol was I supposed to?
Kahi: Look, I have ZERO evidence to help you out, Prpl. I got NOTHING but my attorney’s badge.
Prpl: And you got salt. Don’t forget salt.
Kahi: I guess that helps?
Prpl: I hear it’s good luck to tip salt over. I hear it brings 7 years of good luck.
Kahi: (Who is telling you these lies?)
???: WAIT! Kahi!
Kahi: Chronicler? What are YOU doing here?
Chronicler: I gathered some evidence for ya. Don’t tell Eljay. I took it from the police station after I heard that Eljay was gonna disregard it.
Kahi: Why would he do that?
Cronk: I dunno. He was saying something about you bringing trials unfairly to a close, like the last time. He wants to teach you a lesson.
Kahi: What in the WORLD did I do wrong to him?
Kahi: So what do we got here?
Cronk: I got a thing of spray paint, and some pictures of the Waffle truck that was vandalized. I also got this case of waffles from the scene. It contains the prints of somebody. I also got this watch that was dropped outside your law offices. Unfortunately, I forgot a finger-print analysis. You’re just gonna have to figure it out on your own, pal. You should probably examine them so you have it for the Court Record.
A normal watch that happens to lack any fingerprints. Was found outside of TTV Law Offices.
Cronk: This is the normal truck.
Cronk: Today we found the truck to be vandalized. Whoever did it wasn’t very good at it.
Stolen yesterday by Plural. It seems to have the “M” washed off. However, it still retains the prints of Plural and Looch. Has been opened, and is missing a waffle.
Has the prints of Plural on it. Sprays black paint.
Cronk: Welp, that’s all the evidence I have. Hopefully I can get you more later on. Good luck with the trial!