Venom: Ugh. Can we give it a rest already? It’s obvious that the evidence is not complete for Plural, but if Eljay says it is for the sword then it is. That’s my final word, no more questioning of it! Unless you WANT a penalty?
Eljay: Okay. If you’re so smart, then who WAS the assailant? And you’d better gosh-darn prove it.
Eljay: You-you’re not allowed to! You must answer my question!
Venom: I agree. Kahi, if you’re gonna make claims, you’d better provide evidence first, like Eljay did.
Eljay: Alright, now prove he did it.
Eljay: What about it.
Kahi: It’s not too much. It’s because you’re forgetting one small thing. This waffle box.
Eljay: What’s so great about it?
Kahi: Look at it. It has an opening that wasn’t there from last time. This could NOT have been opened during the last trial, but during the time before!
Eljay: WHAT?
Kahi: Yes… This waffle box… It had to have been opened. I’m pretty sure Plural wouldn’t just open this special collector’s edition box, either. Oh no… It had to have been LOOCH.
Eljay: …
##WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?!
Kahi: Plural would never open something that special. It’s not like him. Only Looch, someone who found this STUPID, would do such a thing!
Eljay: You… YOU!
Kahi: Looch had to have opened this. It’s even got his fingerprints on it! Once Plural entered my place and I left the scene, Looch came to assault him and he opened the box. Oh, and look at this? It’s MISSING a waffle.
Venom: What even is this? A waffle pack opening the case to a new suspect!
Kahi: Yes! The only one who could have done it opened this waffle pack! And that man, would be LOOCH!
The audience begins to chatter as Eljay tries to find a rebuttal.
Kahi: You can’t come up with anything, Eljay, because it’s true. And you KNOW it is.
Eljay: You manipulator… You knew this was gonna happen from the beginning.
Kahi: Eheh… No, actually, I didn’t. I kinda just noticed this now.
Venom: Hm… Honestly, I find this all to be highly suspect. What say you Eljay.
Eljay: Very highly-suspect.
Viper: So that’s it then? My testimony is worthless?
Kahi: No, Viper. It has just let us open up the NEW possibility of a culprit! That’s a good thing!
Venom: Well, honestly I feel we need to re-settle things and take a short, 10 minute recess which can help us get enough thinking and rest to finish this case.
##BANG
February 5th
Courtroom Lobby #3
1:45 PM.
Prpl: Well you seem to be going good, but things seem to get crazy again. Once Eljay looses what’s going on he loses order of the court. Good job, I guess.
Kahi: Please, you’re not helping.
Cronk: You don’t look so good. Why are your worrying?
Kahi: Something feels like it’s gonna go downhill from here. I mean, I got the advantage, but I dunno. I feel like something bad is gonna happen.
Cronk: Well you’re in luck right now. I got you some evidence! Wanna see it?
Cronk: First, we have this deed which belongs to Plural. It clarifies his ownership of the shop.
The SECOND one we have is the Time-Travelling Muaka we found at the scene of the crime. Want me to add them to the Court Record?
Deed ID: 7216
“Plural’s Eggo Waffles.”
Food Truck
Recently leased to Looch.
Time Travelling Muaka: The same one from the September case, except it was present at this crime. Contains Kahi’s prints.
Prpl: Don’t look at me. I don’t have much to contribute.
Bailiff: Alright. Court is now in session. Get back in there.
Cronk: Good luck, Kahi!
~~
February 5th
Courtroom #3
1:55 PM
##BANG BANG
Venom: Alright, alright. Court is back in session for the trial of Prpl Dragon. Is the Prosecution ready?
Eljay: AHEM Yes I am. I’m much more ready than earlier.
Venom: Alright, is the defense ready?
Eljay: Then let us waste NO TIME. Looch, come up here.
Looch: Hello, everyone. I hate you all.
(Audience member boos)
Looch: Heh. You think that intimidates me? Well, you’re nothing but a low-tier noob who keeps dying at Dark Souls. And trust me, I know how that feels. But at least I beat games, unlike you.
Looch: I’m glamourous. And no attorney can say I’m guilty. You know why? Because the gods don’t allow it. I’m just too perfect. That’s why I hate everyone. Nobody can be as good as me.
Eljay: Okay. Um , state your name and occupation?
Looch: Please. You people should already know what that is. Let’s just get onto it.
Eljay: Alright. Testimony away.
Looch:
I am not a very poor guy. In fact, I’m just fine. I love playing Dark Souls, though. Am I guilty? Pff.
Those who think I’m guilty don’t even understand what I did or who I am.
Weeabo? Maybe. But I didn’t kill the man. I just wanted my waffles he stole. He stole them!
As for myself, I came up to this odd stand named “Plural’s Leggo Waffles.” Well I didn’t want that.
So I moved on. I never killed that Plural fool. Your box of waffles means nothing!
Maybe I confronted the guy and tried to take the waffles. Actually I did do that. Hah.
Ergo, I opened the waffles and then he managed to escape. What a dweeb.
Look at that court record of yours. Do you see anything that says I had a murder weapon? No.
Only the sword is the murder weapon. Actually, I think YOU had the murder weapon. Think.
Only Kahi could have been there. He could have killed Plural. He has a motivation, too! Hah!
Cheating in court, trying to make Plural shut up. He could have killed Plural in his own office.
How’s that one for size? Unless you can GET me to admit the crime.
##Court Record
Attorney’s badge: Tells people that I’m an attorney.
Watch: A normal watch that happens to lack any fingerprints. Was found outside of TTV Law Offices.
Eggo Waffle Truck: Say’s “Plural’s Leggo Waffles.” Originally said “Plural’s Eggo Waffles.”
Waffles: Stolen yesterday by Plural. It seems to have the “M” washed off. However, it still retains the prints of Plural and Looch. Has been opened, and is missing a waffle.
Spray paint: Has the prints of Plural on it. Sprays black paint.
http://board.ttvpodcast.com/uploads/db5640/original/3X/7/6/7625890ae58a727ac32ef17f6a57b2b1b1fe4f85.png
Sword: The supposed Murder Weapon. Contains the fingerprints of Prpl Dragon, as well as the blood of Plural Ogel. Was taken off of the wall of Kahi’s office.
Autopsy Report: Contains Plural’s autopsy. He was beheaded by his head getting ripped off. Prior to that he got in a struggle, getting a few bruises on his torso and lower legs.
Picture of the Scene.
Plural Mask: Contains no blood. Has little bite marks on it.
VIPER’S CLOCK IN: 8:20 PM to 8:40 PM.
Time Travelling Muaka: The same one from the September case, except it was present at this crime. Contains Kahi’s prints.
Plural’s Deed
Deed ID: 7216
“Plural’s Eggo Waffles.”
Food Truck
Recently leased to Looch.
Penalties
! ! ! !
Looch: Well yeah. I wanted my stuff back. That buffoon stole my waffles!
Looch: Because I had a cart to run, duh.
Looch: Is that question REALLY important? I made an accusation against you and I expect you to consider it. I said YOU were the murderer, Mr. Killer Nuva.
Looch: Except that’s not what I’m talking about, Mr. Blue Suit. I know what you have in your evidence. A time-travelling Muaka. I know what you wanna say. THAT is the true murder weapon, is it not? It had a jaw. It could have easily ripped off Mr. Plural’s head. There were BITE MARKS were there NOT?
Looch: Again, the Muaka. It’s the murder weapon. It was found at the scene of the crime with YOUR finger prints! Also, you have NO proof to say you were not in the room. Ms. Viper saw a man in the room. That was definitely you.
Looch: Need I also mention that you making a claim of saying “I would never do that” isn’t actual evidence? Looks like I’m winning this case, smarty.
Eljay: You must be stumped. We’ve already established that the mask never got to touch any blood anyways. So that wouldn’t make sense.
Kahi: Hmm… Maybe I need to think outside the box.
Looch: (I’m not a Crusty Crab) Yeah, but didn’t she LIE anyways? Plus she could barely see the scene.
Looch: ALSO! You could have easily forged the scene anyways by dipping the sword in blood.
Looch: I didn’t disregard the female thing. Here’s what I think happened. Prpl, not knowing Kahi too well, attacked him once she saw Kahi MURDER him.
Looch: The murder weapon wasn’t the sword. Maybe Kahi forced her hand. Nobody ran tests for it.
Looch: Proof that I wasn’t interested?
Kahi: Looch, you’re clearly making this up! You know why? Because Prpl would have reported me to bail HER out if I was the one who murdered Plural! Plus, we don’t have any reported injuries. What about YOU?
Looch: WHAT? You can’t just accuse me? I am Looch. I will not go down until I admit murder, but I’m not going to!
Looch: I didn’t alter squat. The Muaka is still the murder weapon. The sword was used as a cover-up.
Looch: Well, if you wanna know, I met with him at the waffle TRUCK at 8:10.
Looch: yeah, we talked like “buddies.” Nothing more.
Looch: No, that’s when I tried to grab them and Plural ran with them. I managed to snag my waffle from it in an argument.
Venom: I will NOT allow it. All the evidence should be here.
Guys. We need to think outside of the box. The testimony. What is so cross about the testimony?
Kahi: Thank you, Looch. That is all.
Looch: What. What do you mean “that is all.” We haven’t PROVEN anything.
Kahi: Yes I have!b You just admitted your crime!
Looch: What- Whu WHAT eVeR dO yOu MeAn? I dIdN’t SaY aNyThInG!
Eljay: Please, Kahi. Explain in detail. I’m just as confused. And why the heck does Looch look like that?
Venom: The host of the game can do whatever he wants! Continue, Kahi.
Kahi: Look at this testimony. When you take the first letter of each line it says “It was me, Looch.”
Kahi: Wasn’t it YOU, Looch, who said that the only way I could convict you is if YOU said it?
Looch: You’re clearly dillusional.
Kahi: Explain it then, why is it not a paragraph but instead a poem of sorts?
Looch: Ergh… It… It was ordained by the gods! I knew I should have just kept losing at Dark Souls instead of coming here and thinking I’d win!
Looch: I mean… You’re still just seeing things? See? Heheheh. You’re seeing static right now!
Looch: Don’t question it! Just enjoy the static while I make a run for it! Metal Gear Solid style! (AKA in a box)
Eljay: Yeah. Looch is definitely highly suspect.
Looch: Oh, so now even the Prosecution doesn’t trust me? What kind of a trial is this? I’ve been FRAMED!
Kahi: This watch was found outside of the TTV Law Offices. I didn’t belong to any of the suspects so far. Does it belong to you.
Looch: I mean, there isn’t anything else I can do, so yeah. What about it?
Looch: Oh I see we’re your going with this. So I guess I’m a suspect now? Nice. Just nice. What did I do, admit my guilt or something?
Looch: Nobody told me about this!
Eljay: Just shut up and take the verdict already. You already freaking confessed as shown by Kahi. Now please, just get out of here.
Looch: No… I CAN’T END LIKE THIS…
#NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW!
Eljay: OH GOSH HE’S BECOMING SUPER SAIYAN!
#IT. CAN’T. END. LIKE. THIS!
#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
#THUMP
Looch: WHY WHY WHY. Why did he have to figure out my trickery! Noo…
Looch: This… This can’t be the end of Looch! Can it be? What will my last words be?
Looch: I know… I know what they’ll be!
Looch: BeeenEEEEEEEETH the SKIIIIIIIIIIINN we ARE already OOOOOOOOOONE…
we ARE ALREADY ONE
#WAS IT NOT YOUR SIN TRAPPED THE UNICORN?
#EVEN NOW, THE EVIL SEED OF WHAT YOU DONE GERMINATES WITHIN YOU.
Swoop.
##Snake? SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!
Kahi: I think someone laced by coffee this morning.
Eljay: Mine too… Actually, I think everybody saw that. I don’t think I’m gonna be able to sleep tonight.
Eljay: After going through that? Oh yes. Looch was definitely the force of evil with this one. I think we know the verdict.
Venom: Uuhh… Yes I was just about to give it.
#Prpl Dragon is…
